Now for a new life

Moving!

2010-04-20T12:17:00.001-05:00

Well, I have some pictures and topics that I have been meaning to get on here, but seem to not have been able to find the time.

But I have big news that will have to be posted before the everyday life topics.

I have been promoted. I am going to be an Assistant Store Manager in the Kennewick, WA store.

Ben has decided to go with me. We are now in the process of getting everything ready to move.

It is a great opportunity for me and I could not turn it down.

My official start date is the 1^st of May, but I am trying to negotiate to start the 10^th. We will see.

I am excited and nervous to be back in the stores.

Just thought I would post this so everyone can know!

For those of you in the Northwest…Here we come!

snow day

2010-02-12T07:54:00.000-06:00

What the heck!! I cannot believe this mess!

Snow in Dallas in February.

I went to 3 stores just to try to find some things for my fireplace which should be common, but none of them had it...They looked at me, smiled and said, it is February...we run out of wood/ and all fireplace items in December, and don't reorder.

Some pics!

A bush nice and green ready to sprout buds!

Last night the back porch

Look how big those darn flakes are

This morning - the little tree in my back yard

The accum as of 7 this morning The back porch again.

Christams

2010-01-02T14:25:00.001-06:00

Christmas Morning. It sure is more fun when you are watching kids get so excited about Christmas!
Cutco for James from Mom and Dad Loot
Santa brought a Bike!
So cool! Thanks Rozy
Thanks Mom!!! WooHoo just what I asked for...actually more than I asked for. Thank you
So excited
Chillin waiting on his turn
What is that big thing?
Cant reach my shark
Woo. Mom. another One!! Someone else was excited too!
Lots of good stuff!
Wating to go see what santa brought
What a handsome boy in Cowboy colors. Someones who knows his aunt must like the Cowboys!

James...What are you telling that boy?

Not enough sleep?

Just goin through the stocking loot!

Good Times!

2009-10-30T16:42:00.001-05:00

A group of us went to a minor league hockey game this past Saturday. The Texas Tornadoes. We started out the evening at Paulios, which is an awesome little place where they have freaking great pizza and pasta. So a group of us started out there having a great time amongst friends, then we headed over to the game. Ben and I with another friend were following Amy, who had two more in her car, and it was an experience! There was one point where we needed to do a U-Turn, we were stopped at a red light when Amy just went ahead and did a U-Turn at the red light and headed the other way…well, Ben and I did not know where we were going (hence the following Amy in the first place…) so Ben just followed suite. (What the heck was she thinking?) :)
Then we get to the park, and Bens truck was too big to fit in the upper section of the parking terrace, so we got good parking right on the ground level.
What an awesome time! I so love Hockey and it was a great game. It ended up going into double overtime which ended in a shootout. They even had a put up your dukes’ fight between two guys who needed to let off some steam. (There was an obvious height advantage to one of the guys, so it was not really fair, but it was still awesome!) So cool. I had a great time hanging out with friends, and watching people getting checked right and left!
Hope we can do it again. It is a very affordable sport to go to live! And one that I really like too.

Famous (not really)

2009-10-14T18:27:00.001-05:00

So I had to do a Broadcast for work today, which consists of me creating the slide show, and writing the script (which this time was easy, because it was very similar to the broadcast that was done last year on the same topic, so I just copied most of it over into the new background).

So I also get to dress up in a suit, which now I work in a business casual environment, I don’t wear suits anymore. But I dug one out of my closet, and put it on. Needless to say, once I got to work, all my coworkers razzed me asking why I was all dressed up 

But I got down to the studio, and there are different ways that they do this, you either do it live and all the stores watch while you are doing it, or they tape with a teleprompter, or they tape with out a teleprompter, and you have to have the times where you are on camera mostly memorized. I got to do the taping with no teleprompter. I was a bit rushed on this one, so I did not have it memorized too well.

But I suppose I did alright. It is an odd experience taping, and it gives you a whole new respect for people who do it all the time. It is one thing to give a presentation in front of a room filled with people; it is entirely different to tape a presentation while staring at a camera with no audience reaction. While still having energy, and smile!

Well, one down, and I am working on the slides and script for one the end of the month, when that one is down, I should be done for the year!

Update

2009-10-07T18:23:00.002-05:00

It seems like I have not had room to breathe the last month. With my new position at work, they keep me hopping all the time! So where I used to have some time to write a little blog now and then at work, I don’t have 1 minute to eek out anymore, in fact I am putting in more hours just to get what I have to get done done, and I like to have a work/life balance! I like my job, but I don’t want to spend anymore time there than I have to.
I have some pics I need to get updated as well, but don’t have time for that, just for a quick note, but I will try to get them on here!

Ben and I have been volunteering at his church every Monday night for the past few weeks, and will continue this through the school year. We are "teaching" English as a Second language classes. It has actually been a really great time, but it goes until 8:30, so Mondays are out to get anything else done since we get there right after work.
It seems like the rest of the week is just as full. I remember the days when I would come home after work and wonder what was on TV to watch. Eat dinner, and then watch TV. I get to do that about 1 day a week now. So my DVR is packed full of TV shows that I used to watch. But I still like them, so I am going to catch-up eventually!
It has started to get cold here (cold for Dallas) and my place of employment does not have heat. They rely on the body heat of the 4000+ who work here, as well as the PC's and lights to heat the building, and the past few days it has been really cold...I come home and just want to jump into a warm bath, or bed.
Butch has been gone for the last few weeks with his papa, and it has been mighty quiet without him. I miss my little buddy. He should be up there with Landon for the next few weeks. We are trying to figure out a time that works best to switch, but it seems that there is so much going on, it is hard to come up with a time.

I had my mid year review at work, and it did not go so well, in fact it is one of the worst reviews I have ever had. So I am having to step it up a whole lot at work. But I am not concerned. I have a new position which I love, and a new boss who has been very supportive, and works me like a dog. I would rather be working like a dog than sitting in my cube looking for something to do, and wondering what I was not doing that I should be! So with all these changes, I have no worries that by the time the year is over, my next review will be sterling!

I feel so very blessed to have so many good things going for me right now. I have a lot going on, and stress has become part of my daily life it seems. I have to step back sometimes and look at all the things that I have which are good in my life. And I have so very much!

More pics

2009-09-07T15:26:00.003-05:00

More pics of the Aquarium, and a video of the Stadium at the Game

Visit with Candace and Aaron

2009-09-07T15:22:00.002-05:00

Here are some more pics of some of the things we did.
We went to the JFK 6th floor museum, and then went to the Dallas World Aquarium.
Both were great!! I feel bad when Mom and Dad were here that the Aquarium was closed it was freaking awesome!!
Here are some more pics...

BYU vs OU

2009-09-07T15:16:00.004-05:00

My sister and my brother in law came ot visit for the weekend and to go to the first college game in the new Dallas Cowboys staduim. We had a really great time! I am so glad that they could come saty and we could see a few sites on Friday, and then go to the game on Sat. Here are some pics...

2009-08-31T18:45:00.000-05:00

2009-08-31T18:43:00.000-05:00

Lake Caddo

2009-08-31T14:06:00.000-05:00

Oh man! We had such a great time in the outdoors this past weekend.
We left for Uncertain TX Friday mid morning, and got there in just enough time to be hungry for lunch, so we quickly put together some lunch, and then after we had our energy back, we roamed around the little house where we were going to be staying the weekend. It was a really cute little place; with frogs and Lilly pads as the décor (I love frogs, so I felt right at home).
The lake was right outside the back door, and they had built a little pier so that you could walk all the way out onto the edge of the deepest part of the lake and watch wildlife. Make yourself a nice hot cup of tea and walk out onto the pier at dusk, or dawn and watch the lake come to life.
Or do what we did, and light a little candle, start the fan, and just sit on the bench in the screened in porch and have some dinner (which we did some great things with) and watch night come.
Can’t say that I am an early enough riser (without the help of an alarm clock) to be able to say I saw the day come!! 
We went into the actual Lake Caddo National Park on Saturday, and took a few of the trails, saw some frogs and other critters (none that were really cool though like snakes or bears) and even saw some poor little dead opossums. We are not sure what happened there, because they were just wee babies.
It was peaceful, and relaxing, and so quiet. It was a great time.
Then came the time to head back home!
We packed up the car, and headed out.
First thing, we noticed one of the tires was low on air, so we checked them all, and they were all a bit low, so we decided to find a gas station and fill them up in the next town big enough to have a gas station that might have air.
So we find a town that has a few stations, and pull over to the first one that is on our side of the road, fill up with fuel, and notice that the air thing is broken.
So we ask the cashier where the nearest place would be that had air that worked, and she pointed us to a place real close to them, so we drive over there, and lo and behold, theirs is broken too. So we had passed a gas station on the other side of the road coming into town, so we head back that way. We finally hit the jackpot, and filled all the tires up with a bit more air.
So once again, we hit the road.
A little while later, we started seeing little ants crawling around in the car. So we just kept going thinking that a few must have transferred in with some of the bags.
Pretty soon, we realized that there may be a bigger issue at hand.
So we found a car wash a little ways off the road that had a vacuum thinking that we would find a few ants, and just suck them up.
Little did we know the true infestation that had happened!
We take out the bags, and see 100’s of ants, so we start up the vacuum, and really get them stirred up!
We vacuum and vacuum until we think we have them all, check all the bags, and Butch’s blankets, and such, and do not see any more ants, so we load back up, and take off. Not 10 minutes later, the little buggers that were left come out of where ever they were hiding and start to crawl all over us (ick!)
So we decided that maybe since the vacuum was sooo loud, that they all hid when it came out, so we found a Wal-Mart and I ran in to see if I could find any of those little glue type traps that you put around in your house. They did not have anything there that we could really use in a car driving down the road except some glue traps that were more meant for mice, but I figured they were only $2, I could get those and see if they worked.
We get them out of the package, and place four of them in the back where we had found most of the ants before, and get read to go again. I tell butch to get into the car, and open the door to realize too late that he had to jump right where I had put the traps to get onto the seat. (augh!) He jumped right into both traps, and got his paws all gluey. I could not help too much to stop him, because just putting the traps down had gotten my fingers a bit covered in glue, as well as I had also bought a can of ant spray that I had put down on the part of the door that we had thought they had run into, and then wiped it off the leather where I had accidentally sprayed. So I had glue, and ant poison on my hands, and really did not want to handle Butch…
We were about done with all this mess!!! LOL
So we got the glue traps off of Butch (and in doing so got more on me!!) and stopped at Wendy’s since it was time to eat if we were going to have to keep dealing with issues like these all day!!
I went into Wendy’s, and worked pretty hard to get the glue off of my hands the whole time thinking to myself how in the world am I going to get this stuff off of Butch’s paws???
I grabbed a whole handful of paper towels, got one group sudded up with soap, one group sopping wet with just water to rinse, and some dry ones, and took them out to start to work on Butch.
I got as much glue off as I could, and figured the rest would just have to wear off!
Went back into Wendy’s grabbed some grub, and asked if anyone there knew of a park we could sit down and eat our food at…they all kind of looked at each other and said “none of us live here, so we don’t know” (they commute to work at Wendy’s?)
Then one guy said “on my way to work this morning, I saw a picnic bench under some trees behind the hospital down the road…
I figured this was our best bet. I did not want to eat in an ant infested car with glue traps catching Butch, and poison fumes rolling around!
We found the table right were the guy said it was, and noticed little ant hills all around it (the ants are taking over our world at this point)
But it was a really nice day, and the bench was under some really nice shade trees, so we sat down and ate lunch!
Got bit by a fire ant, and then headed back to the car to once again try to make it home.
We were killing ants the whole way home, there are finger prints all over the windows with little ant voids in them where we were squashing them.
Man, was it good to get home!!!
Needless to say, both of us got bit a few times by the ever present ants!
I jumped in the shower as soon as I got home to get rid of the creepy crawly feeling that ants were still crawling on me!
This morning when I went to work, there were remnants of little ants killed by poison but I saw no living ants.
Thank heaven!!!
The trip was fantastic! And the ride home was very eventful, but I feel so blessed to have been able to go, and enjoy the weekend, and still get home safe and unharmed (except for those little bites!!!)
I will post some pictures later!

Lawn mowing....Augh!

2009-08-26T13:42:00.001-05:00

Yesterday was lawn mowing Day again…I so don’t look forward to Tuesdays as I know that I am going to need to go home and mow the lawn.
Last week due to my schedule with the Store, I was only able to get the front yard mowed before it got dark, so this week the back yard was pretty long! Plus when I got the Weed eater/edger out to do all the edges, it has passed on, and I am going to need to either see if I can find a new fuel tank I can order, or buy a completely new one. The Fuel tank leaks all over, and hence does not have pressure so I can’t even get it to start. So mowing the lawn in 100 degree weather yesterday was a joy!!! Love it, Love it, Love it!!
i am always pleased with the end results, so it is usually worth it! I do wish I had been able to edge as it always makes it look crisp and clean.

Training

2009-08-26T13:41:00.000-05:00

Since I got this new position, I don’t feel like my feet have touched the ground! I have loved it! There have been a few moments with me fighting with Excel trying to get the darn formulas to work, but I love to be busy, and I love to learn and I have been almost overwhelmed with both!
My first official week in this new position, I actually spent in the store. The entire week. I was trying to learn everything I could about the business that we will be looking to improve.
I think I forgot how tired working in the stores makes you. I was beat everyday when I came home.
One crazy thing about the week: There are probably 6 stores within a 20 mile radius that I could have gone to, but they asked that I go to one in Fort Worth which is a 2 hour drive for me. So I was driving for 4 hours a day plus working 9 hours trying to learn everything that I could as fast as I could.
So needless to say, being up at 5am and out the door, and not getting home till past 7, I did not have time to hardly do anything!
It was a very good week though, and I learned tons! I just now hope that I can teach the rest of my team everything that I learned!

Bosses

2009-08-11T09:53:00.001-05:00

I guess it is time for another post. I have been asked to take another position at work. It is not a promotion, or a raise, just a different set of responsibilities, and a new Boss. It always makes me a bit nervous when I get a new boss, you are not sure what the expectations will be, or if they will be hard to work for, or too easy. It is not easy being the boss, I know, that is why I really do try to get along with all my managers, because even if they are terrible, they are still a person who was good enough at something to be promoted, so I try really hard to find that thing that someone saw in them, and bring it out to help myself!
That is not always easy, and also not always possible! Sometimes the wrong person is in a position of power, and you just have to grin and bear it until you get moved on, or they do!

I really have been very blessed in my life to have many great leaders, and managers. I have had a few rotten ones, and I just hoped that I could make it! It is really amazing the statistics on why people leave the job that they are in. The number 1 reason people look for new jobs, or leave their current job is due to management.
For those of you who have had a jerk boss, I am sure you completely understand!!
There is the misconception that is all about pay and everyone is always looking for more money, but the fact of the matter is, if you pay a fair wage, and you have a good work environment where you have good management, people want to stay and work for you.

I will get off my soap box now, I just know how important it is to have a manager who works with you, and allows you the ability to do your job, and get good results. I hope that with my new manager I get that!

Divorce

2009-07-30T09:44:00.001-05:00

This is one week that I hope I never have to relive. Painful, uncomfortable, and stressful. Landon came home on Sunday because this is the week we had planned to bring everything we have been going through to a close. We had a few more papers to sign before the court date, and then yesterday was the Court date to finalize our divorce.
First off, it was very painful for both of us to be together in the same house after all this, and knowing that in a few days our marriage would be legally over.
Second, I could feel his pain, and that made mine more acute.
I know that to most people that I know, and to my family I have seemed like I was really ok with all of this, and it was having a pretty minimal effect on me.
But this has been the most painful process of my entire life. Severing a relationship with a man whom I loved for over 11 years should not be, and is not easy. It is very hard, and very painful. He was my best friend. I have lost that. Along with losing my husband.
I do know that this was my choice, and Landon did not want to get divorced, and that he is hurting, and I have turned his whole life upside down. The thought that I caused that pain, and also the uncertainty of his life is a very hurtful, painful idea for me to think about.
I never wanted this. But I also know deep in my heart and soul that I have made the right choice.
I hope and pray that he finds true happiness in his life without me, and that I can do the same.
So with all of this, our divorce is Final. Our marriage of 11 years is over.

Work, Work, and More Work

2009-07-26T16:38:00.000-05:00

So the past few weeks have been unbelievable. I will start with the week of the 12th.
I was invited to attend a training session for my job that is a very intense week long training. It was here in Texas, yet they asked that I stay in the hotel with the other participants because we were split into 5 groups of 6, and were expected to do a case study, and presentation on the last day. So We were in training from 8 - 5:30-6 everyday, then went to the Hotel, and worked on our case study, and presentation at night. It was non-stop. Our group happened to be the best group…if you ask me! I was very fortunate to get a good group of six. They all were very easy to work with, and had tons of great ideas! So our group was usually done by 9-9:30 each night, and still turned out the best presentation! Most of the other teams were up until 11-12 still working on theirs! So on Thursday night, we were complete with our PowerPoint, and we had the night to practice. It was a very long, and I did not have any time to do any of my normal work, so the weekend after, I got to work all weekend! The second crazy part, was that I was leaving for a trip where I was visiting 5 stores in Utah and Colorado, and I had had absolutely no time to get anything ready. So Monday I flew out to go on my trip. It went ok, even though it was also a very long, hard trip.
So I have not really been home for two weeks, I had a friend of mine watch Butch for the first week, and put him in the kennels for the second week, and he is a little worse for wear. I am so grateful that I have someone that would watch him that first week, so I did not have to put him in the kennels for 2 weeks in a row. He has a really hard time at the kennels, and I hate putting him up there for too much time.
Well, that is my last two weeks, as it relates to work! I feel like I could sleep for another two weeks, and not ever wake up!

25 Things

2009-07-08T21:16:00.001-05:00

A very good friend of mine sent me a list where he had been tagged on Facebook to write 25 thoughts, goals, or values and post it to his site. So I decided to take a stab at it. He is really good at doing things like this, and I am not so good, but I wanted to give it a try! Here it is. I challenge each of you who read my blog to try this yourself…It was hard for me, and took me more than one day!

1. I believe anyone can do anything if they are willing to do what is necessary. However, you need to realize that sometimes what it takes to get what you want is not worth it, and hope that you don’t realize that after you have already lost something that should have been more important.

2. I love to read. As a child I would go to my bedroom after school, and read until dinner, sometimes I would try to read during dinner (that usually did not go over too well with my mom and dad) then after dinner I would once again go back to my room to read. As an adult, reading is my outlet.

3. My life would not be complete without music.

4. I think I should have been born a boy. I love the outdoors. I love lakes, rivers, mountains. I like to shoot, fish, hike, boat. I love to go to sporting events. I would rather not gossip about stupid stuff, and I HATE SHOPPING. I would rather not ever have to wear a dress, and wearing pantyhose is pure torture.

5. I have always wanted to learn at least 3 languages.

6. I like to work. I may not like every aspect of my employment, but I need something to do, and I really like to earn money.

7. I am loyal. I have been with the same company for almost 12 years and I really have no intentions of going somewhere else.

8. I am one of those weird people who think that the natural way when possible is the way you should go. Pharmaceuticals are not good to put into your body, but…if the medicine you take is the only way to keep you alive, do it. If you can do something else, such as exercise, or eat better, or sleep more, or have less stress, you should do whatever you can to not have to take a pill.

9. I believe in the power of positive thinking, and I try very hard to keep my eyes up towards the sun, and a smile on my face. I also believe in the power of negative thinking, and I try to avoid those people who have continuous negative energy around them.

10. Deep down inside I have always wondered what it would be like to be a witch or Rainbow bright.

11. Or live with elves, dragons, and magic. I love fantasy books. And I would dream about living in a world where fantastic things were possible.

12. I really dislike “reality” TV shows. I live in the real world, I don’t want to watch it as entertainment. I want to be entertained with FICTION!! I love action shows. If it blows up, or drives fast, or shoots, I want to see it.

13. I think that people that blame their current situation on their past need a swift kick.

14. I came from a large family and grew up in the country. My parents are very religious, and want their family to follow suit. I am a constant disappointment to them in this aspect, as I do not feel that their religion is mine right now. All this combined, I had a great childhood, I love my family, and even though they wish I lived my life in a different way, they still accept me, and love me. That is what family is really about. Unconditional love. If you are not able to give this, please don’t have a family.

15. I believe that the mistakes of my past have made me a stronger, better person, I also believe that I will continue to make mistakes, and as long as I learn from them, and keep trying to be a better person, I have not and will not fail. Along with this, If I was given the choice to clear away one thing from my past, It would be hard for me to come up with one.

16. I am from Idaho, and I love Potatoes…Cliché I know, but I could eat them at every meal. Think about it this way, you know the part on Forest Gump where his buddy is talking about all the different ways you can have shrimp??? Here is a little start of that: Baked Potatoes, Mashed Potatoes, Scalloped Potatoes, French Fried Potatoes, Potato Patties, Hash Browns, Potatoes O’Brian, Twice baked Potatoes ect..ect..

17. I do not like to waste time playing Computer Games, or Video Games. I do not own a video game, or a computer game.

18. I am a sports fan-ish. I love to go to sporting events. I do enjoy watching some sports on TV, but any sporting event that I have actually gone to I have enjoyed.

19. I have not ever shoplifted anything (that I remember I say under 5 doesn’t count because I cant remember it)

20. I have taken the 7 habits of Highly Effective People, and also have read the book, and recommend it to everyone. There is one thing in there I can share that I wrote. “What do I consider to be my most important contributions to others” is the question. My response: “Accepting people as they are, and helping them become more if that is their goal.” I feel very strongly about this. I have really strong opposition to the habit of Judging others. That is not our place.

21. One more thing from that workshop. We were asked to draft a personal “mission statement” and here is what I wrote in the 10 minutes that they allowed us.
- Give Something of myself everyday, but don’t let it change me. While I am giving kindness, compassion, time, and anything else that is needed at the time, take that opportunity to learn. Then take what I learn and grow from it. While I am learning to grow, I need to realize that I can endure anything as long as I believe there will always be others who can benefit from something that I have or know that they do not. Be able to accept others as they are, and understand that they are how they are for a reason. Listen to what they have to say, and if they say, or are something that I do not agree with, or believe, or have objections to, I can still let them be who and what they are, because they are unique. Do not resist change, Keep your faith and values but stay open, honest and kind.

22. I have often thought about going back to school, but would have no idea what I would want to go back for. Unless it was to learn those languages I want to learn.

23. I don’t like cats. (I suppose I would not make a good witch after all…)

24. I lived in a state that shares a border with Canada, and have never gone over the boarder. I would like to someday.

25. I do not like meat.

The Lawn

2009-07-07T20:45:00.003-05:00

I used to think that mowing the lawn was a chore, and I would procrastinate, but once I would finally get mowing, it would not be so bad. I have now changed my mind. Mowing the lawn in Texas is miserable. It is too hot to hardly move, yet you have to be in the hot, pushing a mower sweating like you didn’t know you could, getting heat stroke, then you go in, jump in a cool shower, and continue to sweat for another hour or so, all the while drinking as much water as you can. Then lo and behold, the headache from the heat exhaustion comes! I can’t say that I like to mow the lawn any more! Not at all!!
But here are some beautiful pictures of a nice freshly mowed lawn that almost killed me!!!

Good Friends Good Food

2009-07-07T09:52:00.002-05:00

It has been an odd experience going out with friends that are my friends, and not “our” friends since Landon and I have separated. I was invited over to dinner last night to some friends house and they grilled up some pork chops, and some fish, potatoes, and stuffed tomatoes. It was all really good (except the pork!! Cant tell you if that was good or not, but I suspect it was.)
But it has been good just making new friends, and not staying home all the time by myself. (Even though I do enjoy that sometimes too!)

Happy 4th!

2009-07-06T11:03:00.000-05:00

I had a great 4th of July thanks to a new friend of mine. I have made some really good friends since I have started taking violin lessons again, and since we hung out together every Thursday for like 12 weeks prior to the recital.
Any way, one of the guys that is another adult student knows about my current situation, and asked if I was doing anything for the 4th. Of course I did not have any plans, so he invited me to go with him to his friends house in Granbury. We had such a great time! J and B have a boat, and live right there by the lake, so we were out on the lake Friday, and Saturday! J and B’s parents actually live on the lake, so Saturday evening we were at their place with about 40 other people, sat on their dock, and watched fireworks.
I met so many great people, and had a really good time!

Happy Birthday! You are another year older and wiser!

2009-06-29T10:16:00.000-05:00

So one of my good friends blogged about it being her birthday, and no one noticing, or making any effort to make her feel like it is a day to be celebrated. (which it is!!!)
I think birthdays are one of those things that no one really knows what to do about.
Some want to be treated and pampered, some actually tell you to never even mention the day, the less people that talk to them on their birthday the better…Me?
I love my birthday, because it is a day that I have a moment to reflect on what I have done the past year, and what was good, and what was bad, and what am I going to do for myself in the next year to become a better, stronger, or smarter person.
I guess you could say I use my birthday as my New Years. I never make new years resolutions, but I do make birthday resolutions!
My past year has had many ups and downs, and I feel I have finally made the choice in my life that needed to be made probably many years ago. But I wanted so badly for things to get better, and my marriage to become what I needed. But I feel the strength in saying that I have had enough. I can not be the person I have become any longer. I have to make a personal stand. A hard trying hurtful stand. Which in the end will make me a better stronger person. I have not liked what I have become in the past few years. And this is the year! This is the birthday that I am going to give myself the option to be a different person. The one I used to be! The one who woke up, looked in the mirror and liked what she saw. I am looking forward to my next birthday to see what has happened, and what I was able to accomplish.
And I must say, I could not have done any of this with out the support of my family and friends. New and old. Thank you all so very much for just being there if I need anything!

Current Events

2009-06-26T10:00:00.001-05:00

Ok, so Michael Jackson died yesterday, and it was really odd for me, because in my mind he is still the good musician who is in his 20’s. To hear that he died at 50 something, was weird. I guess he got weird enough that my mind regressed, and could never think of the new him, but kept the old him in mind.
This has been a bad week for stars. Farrah Fawcett, Ed McMahon, and now MJ.
I hope three does it.

Psychology 101

2009-06-24T11:38:00.000-05:00

So over the past month or so I have been having such vivid terrible dreams. Dreams where I wake up in a cold sweat with my heart racing and have to allow myself a few minutes to just be able to settle down. I hate these so bad, and the odd thing is that they do not have a common theme. In the past, if I was having nightmares, they would generally be about something in my current situation that I was struggling with. These are about everything in my life, my work, my relationships with my family, my divorce, everything. I am so tired all the time, because I have a hard time getting back to sleep after waking from these dreams, and they are usually in the middle of the night and so I am waking up usually around 3 AM, and just sit there staring at the ceiling just wishing I could forget what I had just dreamed, and go to sleep and not dream.
It is making me a bit crazy, and yes, my life is changing is many aspects, but I am generally a person who can see the good in everything, and believe that things happen at certain times for very specific reasons, and have faith that I will make it through and be better for it, so why am I having such awful dreams, when I really do not feel that way in my hours I am awake…hmmm. I wish I had paid more attention to my psychology classes !!! lol

Survey

2009-06-23T11:59:00.003-05:00

A Survey:

65 Questions You've Probably Never Been Asked

1. First thing you wash in the shower? Hair

2. What color is your favorite hoodie? Um….I don’t have a favorite hoodie. But I have a green one and a blue one. I live in Texas. Not too much need for hoodies around here!

3. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? Nope

4. Do you plan outfits? I plan what I am going to wear as I go to my closet in my towel from my shower. And I wish I had a uniform to wear everyday so I did not have to make these decisions!

5. How are you feeling RIGHT now? Fair

6. What's the closest thing to you that's red? My suitcase

7. Tell me about the last dream you remember having? I am not going to tell anyone about that dream. Just know I woke up, and hoped I could forget it, but have not yet.

8. Did you meet anybody new today? Not yet.

9. What are you craving right now? Mashed potatoes. I crave those all day everyday.

10. Do you floss? Yup.

11. What comes to mind when I say cabbage? Smelly

12. Are you emotional? What kind of question is this? I am emotional when my emotions need to be, but I am also pretty good at keeping these at bay.

13. Have you ever counted to 1,000? I am sure I have. But probably not for may years.

14. Do you bite into your ice cream or just lick it? Depends on if it is in a bowl on in a cone. I am not into licking my ice cream out of a bowl!

15. Do you like your hair? Sure.

16. Do you like yourself? Most Days

17. Would you go out to eat with George W. Bush? Yup. Why would you turn down dinner with a past President of the US? IT is only an hour. If you cant stand the guy you can still say that you went to dinner with a pres.

18. What are you listening to right now? Chatter from the airport.

19. Were your parents strict? They had rules and consequences. But growing up I thought I was sooo picked on. Now I would raise my kids the same way.

20. Would you go sky diving? Yup. If I ever got the chance

21. Do you like cottage cheese? Sometimes.

22. Have you ever met a celebrity? I don’t know. Probably. I just wouldn’t care.

23. Do you rent movies often? Nope. Probably have not rented a movie in 15 years.

24. Is there anything sparkly in the room you're in? nope.

25. How many countries have you visited? One. Mexico.

26. Have you made a prank phone call? I was once an adolescent.

27. Ever been on a train? Don’t remember.

28. Brown or white eggs? The ones that come in the yellow carton.

29. Do you have a cell-phone? Um…when was this survey created?

30. Do you use chap stick? At least 10 times a day.

31. Do you own a gun? Ok..Remember I live in Texas.

32. Can you use chop sticks? I can get stuff from my plate to my mouth. Sometimes it is not pretty though.

33. Who are you going to be with tonight? 100 other people, but in my own room by myself.

34. Are you too forgiving? Depends on the offence.

35. Ever been in love? Yes.

36. What is your best friend(s) doing tomorrow? I dont know.

37. Ever have cream puffs? Yes…

38. Last time you cried? Last week

39. What was the last question you asked? Will you be my contact?

40. Favorite time of the year? Fall

41. Do you have any tattoos? Yup

42. Are you sarcastic? Me? NEVER!

43. Have you ever seen The Butterfly Effect? Yes. I could have lived my life without seeing that one.

44. Ever walked into a wall? Lol. Everyday.

45. Favorite color? Green

46. Have you ever slapped someone? I am sure growing up I tried to slap one of my sisters. Since then I don’t think so.

47. Is your hair curly? No ... straight as straight.

48. What was the last CD you bought? I don’t remember.

49. Do looks matter? Yes.

50. Could you ever forgive a cheater? Depends on many things.

51. Is your phone bill sky high? It is what it is.

52. Do you like your life right now? Not yet.

53. Do you sleep with the TV on? Nope I sleep with Silence.

54. Can you handle the truth? I wish every one would be truthful, I can handle the truth better than I can handle lies.

55. Do you have good vision? Nope. Terrible.

56. Do you hate or dislike more than 3 people? Cant say that I do.

57. How often do you talk on the phone? I talk on the phone a lot, but I mostly keep my conversations under 5 minutes, I really am a face to face type of communicator.

58. The last person you held hands with? Landon

59. What are you wearing? Black pants, Black shirt

60.What is your favorite animal? I don’t know

61. Where was your default picture taken? Wyoming. The Tetons

62. Can you hula hoop? Yes, a bit.

63. Do you have a job? Yup.

64. What was the most recent thing you bought? Pizza

65. Have you ever crawled through a window? Yup.

Career Conversations

2009-06-23T11:18:00.000-05:00

Sitting here at the airport waiting on a flight to Peoria. I have not ever been there, so it will be good to go to a new place. Even if it is only a few days.
So it is that time in my career that I have to start having those conversations with my bosses about where I want to go from here, and what I expect to achieve in my current position. How long do I want to stay, or the question will actually be when can we move you? I have been working for this company for 11 years, and I have moved 8 times. I have been in Dallas now for 2 and ½ years. The longest I have been anywhere, and I can sense they are getting itchy fingers to move me again. I am not sure what I say to this. Do I tell them I would like to stay in my current position for at least another year, and will they actually grant my request. I don’t ever know what is going to happen in my life when it comes to where I am going to live next year. It has been a hard road for trying to plan for the future, but it has also put me in many great places that I would have never chosen on my own. I have also lived places that I know I will not ever choose to live again!
So back to the original reason for this post. I am flying with a leader in the company who has a lot of control over where I go, and how quickly I get there. So this is my chance to speak with this person face to face outside of the office to allow here to gage my readiness to go back out into the field, as well as what she feels I can handle. She is the one person who can say yes I want her in my Region, or no thanks, I don’t think she is the type of manager I want!
I actually have enough faith in my ability’s to not fear that she will say no, but I would like to have a candid conversation with her about my current situation, and ask that I not be moved for a little while, so I can get my life back in order, and not struggle just to get out of bed in the morning.
I also would like to put in a few suggestions on where I would like to live for the next few years of my life.
So these next few days could make a huge difference in the next few years of my life. I hope that I am up to the task of proving that I am able!

Recital # 2

2009-06-20T20:22:00.002-05:00

This recital went much better if you will. The notes I played were right. I did have a bit of a section where I got off with the piano, and the other violin, so I stopped playing rather than play in the wrong spot, but I got back in there, and went on. Here are pictures from the second recital.

Recital number 1 pics

2009-06-16T08:44:00.002-05:00

Trees take 2

2009-06-14T12:11:00.003-05:00

Here are the pictures of those trees today!
Yippee! they are growing!
We had to put wire around the one tree, because it kept getting ate by the rabbits! Now those pesky guys aren't chewing on it every night, it has really taken off!

Trees

2009-06-13T23:35:00.004-05:00

There is something in my yard that was not here when we moved in that is growing!!
Ok, so every year my place of employment has an Earth day celebration, and gives seedling trees away.
Here is a picture of the two that lived last year when we planted them (the one with leaves is actually from the year before, we had planted it in a pot because it was so little, so this is a picture after we actually planted it in the dirt.)
These pictures are from last year. Tomorrow I am going to post some pictures of these same trees this year!

Results first time around

2009-06-13T23:28:00.001-05:00

So today was the first of the recitals, and everyone did really well. I was the most advanced student there, so my duet with the Maestro was the last student piece, then he did a solo at the very end.
So here is how it went…
Not so good. There are many many excuses! First. I have come down with a cold in the last two days, so it happened that I felt awful today. The instructor who was the other part of the duet was alas, also under the weather. It was sooo hot in the recital room that when it finally came to my part I was sweating (gross right!) bad part when your hand sweat your palm does not slide so easily over the neck of the violin so those hard parts where you are changing position 4 times in two measures were rough! Next I am not sure what happened with the pianist, she is very good, but this is a VERY hard piano accompaniment, and I honestly do not know if it was her fault, or our fault, but we kept getting off time with the piano, so it was a disaster! Beyond the excuses! I did feel prepared, so maybe next week it will be better!

Missing my support teams

2009-06-11T22:28:00.002-05:00

Well, since I am not able to have family at my upcoming recital, I thought I would add the song I am going to be performing on my play list so at least you can hear it, and pretend that you are watching me play!!
It is the very last one on the playlist. The Bach Double. Click on it, close your eyes, and pretend!

It was a Dark and Stormy night

2009-06-11T22:19:00.002-05:00

We had a bit of a storm here in Dallas last night...
We got up to 75 MPH winds, and lots and lots of rain!
(At least I do not need to water the lawn this week!

Violin Rehearsal

2009-06-10T07:49:00.004-05:00

With taking violin lessons comes the joy of doing recitals.
So Certain Music has a violin/piano recital for the next two weekends, and I am lucky enough to be playing my part in both of them.
Actually, Recitals are long and arduous, but I really do enjoy them.
I enjoy seeing how far the kids have come from the last time I saw them play and such.
Practicing is the hard part. I thought it was hard as a kid, as an adult, it is very hard, because of time. You not only have to make the time, you also have to still have the energy by them time you pull out your instrument to take the time to really pay attention to what you are practicing. Not easy!.
Here is some pictures of one of the recital rehearsals.

Career Updates

2009-06-09T14:57:00.003-05:00

One of the changes I was alluding to in one of last blogs is that my boss at work was promoted last month to be a District Manager in Buffalo NY.
So our team has been waiting patiently to find out who our new boss is going to be.
We finally found out who it is going to be this past Friday.
Our new Boss is from here in the Home office, but has quite a bit of experience. I have never met him before yesterday, so I have no idea how it is going to be to work with him, but as always I hope for the best.
However, I have learned from past experience that even if you end up with a manager who you do not have the best relationship with, you still have to do your best so that others around them can see you have potential even if your immediate boss does not see it, or does not want to see it due to personal conflict.
So, here is to the immediate future at my place of employment.

More of the last

2009-06-08T22:18:00.001-05:00

Too many pictures I guess.
Here are some more.

Dallas Arboretum

2009-06-08T22:13:00.002-05:00

When my Mom and Dad came to visit in April, one of the places we took them was to the Dallas Arboretum.
We spent almost the whole day there! It is a huge place.
Here are some pictures!

So Behind

2009-06-07T19:41:00.002-05:00

I have had quite a bit of change in my life in the past few months, and I have tons of pictures to post, and such, but I have not had time, and have not wanted to post some of my life events yet as not everyone in my family knows about them. So instead of having them find out from a blog, I have been waiting until they all had heard first hand. I hope everyone is well, and stay tuned for some blogging!

2009-03-19T20:38:00.003-05:00

I am not sure how this tagging works, or which folder where, but this is my best interpritation! This is the seventh picture from my seventh folder in my pictures.
Now I tag Sharee, and MJ.

From three cars to two!

2009-03-01T11:19:00.002-06:00

We have had three cars for sometime, and have been frustrated that we could not sell one of them due to the situation with the world, so we decided to go to a dealer and see if we could get rid of two of our vehicles, and get one.
So Landon went to the dealer at about noon the other day, and about 3 he called me and asked if I could meet him, because they were willing to deal with what we had, so I took off work a little early, and went to the dealership. Needless to say, we were not in a tight spot, so we had no need to take an offer that did not help us. We were there until 9pm that night, dealing with them to get a deal that we wanted.
It ended up that we got pretty much what we wanted. So we were pretty worn out after that day, but are pleased with the outcome.
We will have to post some pictures of it later, but it is a Hyundai Sonata. Black.

NASCAR

2009-03-01T11:08:00.004-06:00

I don’t know if many of you all know that Landon and I are fans of NASCAR, but we were watching qualifying yesterday for the Vegas Race today, and Mark Martin (Landon’s guy!) had some Pop-tarts that he was talking to the TV guy about, and Landon and I thought that that was cool, so we had to go and get some.

Landon’s gear

2009-03-01T11:03:00.001-06:00

Landon had a speaker cabinet that was getting a little ratty due to its many years of hard work, so a few weeks ago, he decided that he wanted to freshen it up a bit! Here is a picture of what he did! I was pretty impressed!

Cupid's Day

2009-02-14T21:35:00.002-06:00

This was my Valentine today!

I hope that everyone had a Happy Valentines Day today.
A co-worker of mine was talking about being at the store buying her son valentines cards for school, and he asked if she would by a small box of chocolates for a girl that he liked (he is in kindergarten). Anyway, my coworker was pretty freaked out about it. I thought it was funny, and brought up memories. Perhaps not of kindergarten, but probably first grade when I would chase a boy I liked around I think in 1st grade it was a poor child named Wesley.
Ahh childhood and valentines day.
Now as an adult you try to do something nice with your loved one.
Unless work gets in the way, which in my case it usually does.
So it was a pretty normal day today. I was going to make cookies, but I would have way too many for just Landon and I to eventually eat, and one of my co-workers said that if I brought in valentines cookies they would probably not eat them. (with thoughts of me coughing and hacking while I was baking!)
Such kindness at work J
Makes sense though. I have had a nasty sounding cough, and if someone brought cookies to share that had sounded like me all week I would probably decline as well!

All in all, I do hope that everyone had a good day! Especially any of those newlyweds out there!

Optimism

2009-02-08T11:43:00.000-06:00

So Texas is having this Flu epidemic right now. Schools, Churches, all sorts of things closing to de-germ due to the amount of people getting the flu. Yesterday I myself start to feel very icky. I decide to go to the doctor as soon as possible to see if it is the flu to get on the meds as soon as possible because I don’t like being sick!
So I go to the CareNow center just down the street. Which I was impressed with. I was called back within 10 minutes of the time I got there. The doc came right away swabbed my brain tissue (it felt like. They stick that swab way up in your nose!) then I waited for the test results.
Lucky for me I do not have the flu but instead a “Upper Respiratory Infection” in layman’s terms a cold.
So the doc says it looked like my symptoms were pretty severe for a cold, so she would give me prescription strength cold remedy. So I think cool. Go to the pharmacy to get it, ask them how much it is before they fill it. They say it is about 10 bucks. So I said ok.
They fill it (needless to say I waited longer for the prescription to be filled than the whole doctor process took.)
I finally go up to pay for it, and they say that will be $100. Please. Um..ok. I don’t care what the doc says. I am not going to pay $100 dollars for a cold symptom remover. So I asked what happened from the time they told me it was $10 to now? They said it must have been a mistake. So I said ok. Well I do not need it after all. Went and got an over the counter med, and bought that instead for the $10.
Pharmaceuticals…..really $100 for a cold medicine. That is crap!
Oh well. I am here at home now dosed up on stuff that makes me feel wack. I just hope I feel enough better to go to work tomorrow, because I don’t think I can take this medicine and work at the same time. I would make some crazy decision that would make me lose my job!
And the way I feel, I don’t think I could not take the meds and function either!
So here is to a long recovery day, and night and waking up feeling like spring!

Back to the basics

2009-02-07T13:47:00.001-06:00

I have decided to get back into playing the Violin full time, so I found a teacher that could teach advanced violin, and today was my first lesson. My instructor is a bid odd, but I have found most good teachers have many idiosyncrasies. I have not really played since I moved away from home. First problem was I lived in apartments that the walls were very thin, and I did not feel comfortable practicing. When Landon and I got our first home, I had not played for at least 5 years, so by that time it was not high on my priority list. I did miss playing, but with the car accident that I was in it hurt the part of my back that houses the muscles that you use when you play, and it was painful to play for longer than a half hour or so, so I just did not pull it out again. It is still painful to play, and I have to really relax, and stretch those muscles, and then still put a massager on particular spots after I play.
After my lesson today, the parts of my body that I use to play with the proper form were so worn out they were quivering! I guess I will have to start to really practice to get back into shape.
I am looking forward to getting back into it, and finding venues once I am polished again to play.

Cookies!!

2009-01-29T21:25:00.004-06:00

Cookies!
Everyonce in a while, I get in the mood to make cookies. The Ice day was one of these.
So I made a batch of cookies. Since it is just the two of us, I halved the recipe, and I still got this many cookies (and this is after we ate a bunch). So I sent Landon off with a dozen to give to the guys to eat, and I will probably take some to work myself for everyone to eat, so I dont have them lurking around saying "eat me!"

Ice Day

2009-01-28T12:02:00.002-06:00

Well, the roads around here were terrible, so I choose not to go to work today. I probably would have been fine, but I have had bad luck in the past with icy roads, in fact, most of all the accidents I have ever been involved in have been when I lost control on icy roads. So my philosophy, don’t go out, don’t wreck. Simple as that!
Plus, I am provided with a laptop for work, and can call in and get my voicemail, so I can do as much from home as I can at work. So there is no real incentive for me to go out in the nasty when I can do my work from home.
So it is an Ice Day for me today.
Picture from the front of my car. It has warmed up to 26 degrees, so it has started melting dark surfaces. That is good!

Duty to God and my Country

2009-01-23T19:10:00.002-06:00

Ok, I just had a day that I hope is never ever repeated. I got the lucky jury summons in the mail, went and once again was lucky in that I got selected for the jury.
This was a criminal case, and not only that it was three separate cases all in the same trial.
I wont go into it, but after a full day of trial, we went to deliberate at about 6:00pm. I will tell you this, being on a jury of strong minded people when you yourself is strong minded is not an easy task.
My blood was boiling in that back room for people that had other agendas. I was trying to be impartial, and others were using their own backgrounds to convict the person. I think that that is so wrong. I know that it is life, but when you have someone’s entire future in your hands, I think you should be able to put aside your own prejudices for a minute and come up with an unbiased verdict. But as goes life, a persons life was altered because of the decision that was made by 6 “impartial” people. It is their life, and it was their choices. Now I just have to have faith that the person can make choices now to pull themselves out of what they created, and we judged. I do not want to have this responsibility again. EVER.

Update

2009-01-22T18:43:00.003-06:00

Ok here is the update I promised.
Butch is doing fine, he is not using his leg like he needs to, but he also has not had the attention that he has needed. I have been having to go in early and leave late this week for work, and Landon has once again been gone all week, so he has unfortunately been kenneled all day everyday. His wound is healing well so taht is good! Here are some pictures.

C'est la vie

2009-01-22T10:06:00.001-06:00

I am going to have to post an update on Butch, I keep meaning to, but I want to get a picture of his now healing scar, and I have not yet, so I have not posted…I will perhaps tonight!
On a different note, at work this week we have had our district managers in for a week long meeting to set them up for this years happenings in the company.
Yesterday I had one of the presentations on a new program we are rolling out. I practiced as much as I felt I needed to, and read through my presentations a few times, felt that I was pretty well versed in what it was I was covering. As I got into the room with the District managers, I knew that my boss was going to be there, and I found out earlier at lunch that my bosses’ boss was going to be there. Which made me a bit more nervous. I usually don’t get too nervous to do presentations, but when the two people fully responsible for my job placement are going to be there…It ups the stakes a bit.
Well, fast forward to the actual time of the presentation. I was sitting there quietly waiting for my time to present when my bosses bosses boss walks in…Holy crap!
To give you a bit of reference, this man is one of the few executives in our company. Meaning his direct boss is the CEO.
So I gave my 20 minute presentation. I felt that I did ok. I was told that I did not emulate the fear that I felt, that I looked relaxed and poised…I just hope that I did, and they were not just trying to make me feel better!
Geez I am glad that is over.
You would not think that 20 minutes would have that much effect on your job, but the way that the corporate world works, it really does. Those 20 minutes with all of the higher ups that have control over my career could make or break it.
I will say one thing. I am so glad that the head guy did not show up until right before. If I would have known that he was going to be in my session, I would have freaked out, and probably really screwed up.
C'est la vie

Word to the wise from the unwise!

2009-01-11T16:38:00.006-06:00

Don’t ever make bread with yeast that has been in your freezer for an unknown length of time! You will end up with loaves 1 and 1/2 inches high! They taste fine, they will fill you up with the same amount of slices, they will just not work so well for sandwiches, toast, or a few other things! Good for dipping in soup though! Guess we will be having lots of soup for a while!

Arts and Crafts

2009-01-10T14:46:00.002-06:00

I have never been the artistic type that sees the way something would look, and can do it and make it look like that. I usually have to mess up quite a few times before I can get something close to right.
My parents bought us all frames, and had us select shells that they brought back from their mission to put on the frames.
I got all of this when I went up there for my brothers wedding. They had a glue gun all set up. but I knew that I could not do it there, and still take it on the airplane home, so I just got my frame and my shells.
Came home, I have a glue gun somewhere, but I really cant remember where it is, so I got out the super glue. I now have no fingerprints due to all the super glue I got on my fingers, but the frame is complete!
Here is a picture of the finished product. The best I could do without being able to mess up..(super glue does not let you do redos!)

Butch Update

2009-01-09T19:11:00.003-06:00

Butch is really frustrated with his lampshade, and really wants to go at those itchy stitches, but alas we cannot have any of that so lampshade it is. When I am not doing anything distracting like writing a post :) , I have been taking the lampshade off, and watching him. He has gotten so he will forget about it for a minute, then all the sudden, he lunges for the stitches, and I have to lunge for him, or make a loud distracting noise. He has gotten a little irritated at these tactics, and has started growling at me every time I tell him not to bother his stitches. If I did not feel so bad for him, this would be extremely amusing. I am sure it will be one of those things that I can laugh at in a few weeks, but right now I feel too bad for forcing him to wear a lampshade! He has such a hard time figuring out how to see, and walk with it on, I have a short video of how he has not quite got it. Sorry about the wigglyness of the camera...I am not too good at keeping her steady! He has learned to walk pretty good with it on hard surfaces, but take him out on the grass, and he does head dives, then steps on it, and falls over. We now take it off before he goes outside, and just go out with him!

Rough Night

2009-01-06T06:54:00.002-06:00

Once again, poor Butch.
I feel so bad for the little fella. Landon picked me up from the airport around 11:30 last night, and had no choice but to bring Butch along since he was still all drugged out. It seemed that the jostling of the road was hurting him, because he started to whimper, and moan. It is so hard to hear him make noises that mean he is in pain, and there is nothing that we can do.
Butch is a dog that sleeps with us in our bed.
Circumstances as they are, we had to make a bed for him on the floor since he is still wobbly, and has that giant lamp shade around his head. We did not want to jostle him while we slept.
We finally got to bed around 2:00 , and about 3:30 Butch woke me up with his whine, and I did not know how to help him.
So I gave him some water, and then I guessed that he did not know what to do not sleeping with us, since he always has.
I made up a little bed for myself on the floor next to him, so I could give him some comfort since I did not know if the pain meds were wearing off, but I did know that we could not give him more until the morning.
So I slept on the floor. And not 5 minutes after I got settled, he wobbled over, and laid down beside me, turned out, he just wanted the warmth and comfort. Poor little guy.
The doctors told us that the surgery went well. They had to make the groove in his leg bone deeper, and said that there was quite a bit of wear and tear on the ligament, so they expected down the road that he will develop arthritis in that leg. I feel bad that we did not catch it until now since that meant that this had been going on for sometime.

Happenings of 2009 Already

2009-01-04T10:27:00.002-06:00

When I have not been at my Parents house during this vacation that I took to support my brother at his wedding, I have been at my sister’s home with her 4 children.
I have enjoyed so much being able to spend time with my nieces and nephews and with my sisters and brothers. I know that I said this in my last post, but I do miss being close to my family, so when I do have a week or so to spend time with them, I try to make the most of it.
My brother’s wedding was beautiful, and his bride outshone everything. It was a very nice wedding, and reception, which they put together without very much help from anyone.
They planned most everything, and did a very good job.
I hope only the best for these two as they embark on their lives together. I know that they will have struggles just like the rest of us had, and continue to overcome, I only hope and pray that they can get together to figure out how to stay together!
They are a very cute set, and it is so good to see my brother so incredibly happy.
Now onto another topic...life.
Landon plays tonight, and still has to make it home by 7am to get Butch to the doctor to have his surgery. I am very nervous about this as my little wee dog is like my child, and it is a surgery. So I am freaking out! :) But I am sure that everything will go well, and my little tripod fella will be a tripod hurting fella with a lampshade on his head for a while until the stitches can come out. In the meantime, Butch is going to be left home during the day by himself while I go to work, and Landon goes off to play.
I was hoping that Landon would have a week or so where he was not working quite so much, because I would have felt so much better if someone could stay home with him for his first week after the surgery, but alas, he feels he need to go play, and bring home some bacon. I cannot take off either since I have just had a whole week off. So until he can get up and around this will be fine, but the vet said in a week or so when he needs to start his physical therapy I will probably need to come home from work during lunch to get him up out of his kennel, and walk around to get the leg working again. This is going to be tight as it takes about 35 minutes to get home from work without traffic. And it will be during lunch when there will be some traffic, so I hope that I can do it. I sure do wish that Landon was home….oh well.
Here is to the first test of the New Year to see how we handle small hardships!
I hope we pass!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

2008-12-31T18:01:00.001-06:00

My Brother is getting married this week, so I am here at my parent’s house with most the rest of my family, and we have been having a pretty good time. We have been getting a few things ready for the wedding, and getting ready for new years with the fam. It is nice to come and spend time with my family; I do not get this chance very often.
Landon is playing this weekend of course as it is a big weekend for music. I hope that we both have a good new year in our separate parts of the country, and will be able to celebrate when we are both together again.
I hope that all my friends and family have Great new years, and here is to the New Year.
Out with the old, in with the new.
HAPPY 2009 everyone!

Christmas 08

2008-12-25T15:15:00.009-06:00

We feel so blessed to be able to celebrate Christmas together. I am not going to write a whole lot, but I am going to post some pictures of the day!
We hope that each of our friends and family have a great Christmas, and get to spend time with their families. We have had a fantasitc time.

The Spread.

Turkey

Fruit and Cheese Tray

Veggie Tray

Ready to Eat! (Yes we are still in our PJ's it is Christmas!!! Who gets dressed?)

Before we started Unwrapping, but after Santa came!

Another picture of before

Opened Gifts
Thank you everyone!

Closer Shot of opened Gifts!

Butch's new stairs

Landon playing with his new stuff!

Where is the spirit?

2008-12-10T18:42:00.002-06:00

I have been very reflective of late, With Christmas right around the corner, I am missing that Christmas spirit that I need. My mind has been bogged down by everyday problems, and reminiscence.
I have a friend who got married this year, and this will be her first Christmas as a wife. This made me think back to my first Christmas as a wife. It was a grand Christmas. We had very little money, yet it was probably the best Christmas we have had as a couple. Even without kids, it seems that life has taken over, I sometimes wish that I could go back to that time, and walk around, and feel those wondrous feelings again. Even go back to being a child, and the wonder that Christmas held. Time spent with Family, and traditions.
Perhaps the spirit will come, and we can have another grand Christmas!
I am for sure looking forward to next year. Perhaps I can make more of it than I did this year. 2008 has been very taxing.
I have to continuously sit my self down, and have a pep talk. I could have it so bad.
My husband could be off fighting a war instead of off playing music. I could have lost my home in the loan crisis. Or everything for that matter. I have a very full life! If guess sometimes I just catch myself feeling sorry for myself for the trials that I have, and forget to look around and see how good I really have it.
Perhaps tomorrow.

Now what

2008-12-05T21:48:00.002-06:00

Today was my company’s Christmas party. Last year the Christmas party was lavish. It was at night, and it was all the food, and drink you could want, as well as games of all sort. And some live entertainment.
This year with all the cutbacks that everyone is doing, the Christmas party was during the day. They still provided lunch. There was still lots of games, and entertainment. I was sad that my Husband would not be able to come and hang out with me at this party (he was probably thrilled that he did not have to come hang out at my work party!)
About 2:00, after the party was winding down, our boss came around and told us that if we wanted to, we could go ahead and go home for the day.
Well, of coarse if your boss tells you you can go home, you do. My problem was Landon is gigging, and so I really did not have any reason to come home early except to surprise the dog to let him our of his kennel early. (like he even understood it was early!)
So I came home wondering what to do with myself. This is probably the worst part of being married and not having any kids. When my better half is not home, sometimes I am incredibly bored. Then I start to think since that is all I have to do.
When I start to think, I usually get myself in trouble, so once again, I should have found something productive to do today instead of thinking.
I thought of all sorts of things that upset me, and so here I am at 10:00 blogging about nothing, because there is no way that I could blog about my thoughts. So I am trying to waste time so that I don’t keep thinking!

Tis the Season

2008-12-03T19:15:00.004-06:00

Every Year at my place of employment they have an “angel tree” where you adopt an angel for Christmas and get these kids some Christmas gifts. For the last two years I have been the chosen one of our team to choose the angels, and collect the donations, and do the shopping.
This is something that I do not mind doing at all. Which goes against everything I do mind…I hate to shop, and I hate to spend money.
Difference here, is it is not all my money, and it is for a child that otherwise may not get anything. So I really enjoy going out and getting these gifts.
They are so sad in some of the things they put on their slip as “needs” We “adopted” 3 year old twin girls, and got they a coat, and shoes as well as little sweatshirts, and we got the Barbie collections movie(three movies) and a pink Barbie CD player. So they got everything that they asked for and a bit more.
It is always hard for me to do these things on my own without a little nudge.
Not because I don’t want to help, but it always seems like I go through the season thinking of where the money is going to come from for the gifts that I need to buy, and where all the time is going to come from to do baking if I am going to give that sort of gift, and to go to all the “parties” that we are invited to, and still decorate the house, do all of that jazz, and I don’t even have kids!!
Anyway, it seems that the season starts, then it is over, and I never even took time to really “give”.
I always strive to be a better person at seeing those in need, and doing something for them. And usually the rest of the year I really do pretty good, but the time when perhaps they need things more because of the cold and such, is when I don’t think I have the time….
There was a tradition that my family did when I was growing up that I have tried to continue in some form since I have left home, and that is…
We would get two or three big cardboard boxes, and fill them with food. Turkeys, potatoes, you know the such, and then if we had anything else, gift type things, we would include those as well. Then we would carry each box to a family’s house that we felt would benefit from this, drop it off, ring the doorbell, and run.
We had such a great time doing this, and we never really knew how the family felt, or if they did indeed benefit from this gift, but we always had a good time doing it.
That is the type of giving I like. The kind that is anonymous.
I hope that this year when things are tough that we can all find the true meaning of Christmas, and enjoy our families! I am certainly going to do my best.

Thanksgiving the Oklahoma Way

2008-12-01T19:54:00.003-06:00

This was Last years goods...

As it turns out, Landon had a gig on Thanksgiving day, so we threw tradition out the window, and headed to Oklahoma to a Casino to spend our Holiday.
We got everything ready to go, and realized that we had not yet ate breakfast, and it was getting closer to lunch time, so we planned to grab some fast food once we were out of town…Easier said that done on Thanksgiving day! We stopped at 4 places before we found one that was open. As it turned out, it was one of my least favorite places, but we made due!
We than drove another 5 or so hours, and got to the Casino, went to check into our room only to find out that the Casino had been without power for a few hours, so there was no TV, and no Thanksgiving dinner…We were not even sure there was going to be power for the band to play.
But they worked feverishly, and got the power back on, that is when the fun really started…because there were people gambling when the power went out, the casino had to match each of these people with the machine they were on (via the security cameras) Then get them all their money.
The gamblers were quite restless, and the Casino’s do not sell any alcohol on Holidays, so everyone was double mad…That is when the Casino decided that if they could not sell it they would give it away. So there was beer on the house all night for everyone…It made the band happy, because the beer of coarse was only to be had in the “bar” area where they were playing, so they had quite a crowd!
Lets go back to the No thanksgiving Dinner part. I was sorely disappointed since I was looking forward to good dinner.
Well, since the power had been off, the band actually went on an hour later, so Landon and I went in search of a Thanksgiving dinner! We figured that most regular places were closed, so we headed down the freeway to find a truck stop with a diner. We found one, and lo and behold they had a Thanksgiving dinner Buffet. It was definitely Truck stop food, but I was so happy to find thanksgiving dinner, that I did not mind at all!
All in all, it was a Thanksgiving to go down in the books as definitely out of the norm. But we really did have a good time! I was content to be able to spend it with my husband.

The finished product after only 4 years

2008-11-25T16:58:00.003-06:00

This has been a project that we started when we lived in Springfield MO quite a few years ago.
It is nice to finally have it done.

Poor Butch

2008-11-22T18:26:00.002-06:00

Last week, while I was out traveling, Landon had to take Butch with him to his gigs. While out there, Butch sprained the tendon that goes in front of his knee. It I guess keeps going in and out of the position which it is supposed to stay in, and looks to be painful. Landon took him to the Vet on Monday to have it looked at, and he gave him a steroid shot in his leg, as well as gave us some pills to help the pain, and swelling. I had been giving him these pills since Monday, and thought to myself only yesterday, I wonder what is in these pills. So I look them up on line. They are Rimadyl. Apperantly they have had mixed reviews. It said when they were doing the clinical trials that 39% of the dogs had reaction that caused medical care or death. Yet they still approved it.
I know that there are people out there that don’t understand how I feel about my dog, but I love him like he is my child, and to be having him take a medication that 39% of dogs either had to go to the vet because of liver and or kidney failure or died was very upsetting.
With those of you with children, think about finding out these odds on a medication that you were giving to your child. You would freak out!
Now. What is the difference between pills for animals and pills for humans? A 39% bad reaction rate was low enough to pass this drug. Here is what they have to say in an Update about the drug.

“Of all the ADE reports CVM received in 1998, thirty-nine percent (39%) or 3626 involved Rimadyl®. The number of ADE reports received by CVM for Rimadyl® is considerably more than that received for other animal drugs. For any one ADE report, there is no absolute certainty that the suspected drug caused the effect. The adverse effects in these reports are consistent with those expected for NSAIDs. They typically involve the gastrointestinal system, renal/urinary system, hematopoietic (blood) system, neurological system, and the liver. Approximately 13% of the 1998 Rimadyl® ADE reports for dogs involved death of the dog, either on their own or by means of euthanasia.”
Here is the link:
http://www.srdogs.com/Pages/rimadylfr.html

13% died. Nice. Anyways, I have not seen any adverse reaction to the drug yet, and I do not know what to do. It is helping his pain, and it is Saturday. All the vets are closed. Do I keep giving it to him, or do I stop, and let him suffer? I think I would rather him suffer than die. But so far he has been fine. Ah dilemmas

Weekend

2008-11-22T17:58:00.011-06:00

It is ready to be stained. (this dresser used to be the same color as the bed in the first picture)

Stained

This weekend I am going to having to be productive. I have stained a dresser that we sanded all the paint off of, and will varnish it tomorrow.

I have also gone through all my books and cataloged them online so that I have that, as well as making a pile of ones that we need to get rid of. That was actually quite a chore since I have 3 five shelf bookshelves completely full of books. I have just finished this, and have freed up 4 shelves to put the wood carvings that my parents brought home from FSM. The trick was, the shelves you can see on top there are actually 3 books deep! I just fit 3 times as much on one shelf!

Northern California, and Southern Oregon

2008-11-16T10:03:00.004-06:00

This last trip that I went on was to a few stores in Oregon, and a few in Northern California.
Past the town of Weed and all

I was only there for 3 days, but hit the ground running, and did not stop until I was back in the airport on my way home.
There is not a direct flight from Dallas to Medford, so on the way out, I connected in Los Angeles. After that experience, I have told myself to remember to NEVER connect out of LAX again. It was very time consuming, and odd. I had to wait for a bus to take me from terminal C to Terminal B, then wait on another bus to take me to terminal A. Not to mention, there are really no signs that say what needs to be done. You have to ask, unless you are lucky enough to see the one sign that has an arrow and says gates 30-40 here. You follow that sign to an empty room thinking “ok now what? I don’t see any gates. Then a bus pulls up outside of the terminal (where all the planes are driving around and taking off) and you figure that must be your ride.
It was odd. Oh well, I am a seasoned air traveler, so I was pretty calm. I was just looking at those first timers, and feeling bad for them.
I luckily connected out of Salt Lake on the way back.
Going to the west coast always seems to take so long, then you think about it, and it does take a long time. I left on Tuesday morning from Dallas at 6:00. I landed in Medford at 11:00. With the loss of two hours, that is 7 hours of travel. It seems like Oregon is not that far from Texas! But it is!
While was there, I was in awe almost the whole time. It is so beautiful up there. Each time I went through Grants Pass, It was raining, and foggy but you could still see the splendor through all of that. I am sure glad I took this trip in the fall, and was blessed to not have to drive Grants Pass in the snow!
I sure do miss mountains.
I am now complete with my travels for this year. We are now going to let the stores focus on the Holiday Season, and hope for the best! I am a little relieved that I am done with travel now, because the Region that I am over is not a fun Region to traverse in the winter! Plus I am a little wore out from the travel! So no I can get ready for all the holidays myself!

Another Post from Landon about Pres elect

2008-11-08T12:32:00.001-06:00

Last night, President Elect Obama gave one of the all time great speaches. As most of you know, I've been fairly vocal in my support of John McCain as President. I believe Obama demonstrated to us last night what makes him so appealing to so many...he inspires a belief that tomorrow will be a better day than today.

It's time for all of us to embrace our new President and look towards the future. I'm on the record as being skeptical of Obama because of his lack of a track record. If he continues the path he's demonstrated over the last 60 days, he will be a solid President for everyone.

As he said in his speach last night, "for those of you who didn't vote for me...I'm going to be your President too." If he truly means that, and will govern like that...I believe our country will again be headed in a good direction.

As much as I like John McCain, I believe Barack Obama offers the very best possible chance to really inspire Americans and will challenge many Americans to look within themselves and realize status quo has changed.

There are many reason why I believe that the best decision was not made. Hopefully, (and I truly mean this) I will be proven wrong. But don't expect me to be easy on him. :-) There are many serious problems that need attention NOW! I hope he can come through with the promises that he made so many people believe. What a salesman. Now I just hope he comes through with the guarantee!

God Bless America. I hope and pray President Elect Obama is the man he wants America to believe he is. If he is...Americans made the right choice tonight.

Side note post from Melanie:
Isn't my husband wise? He and I are on the same page here.

Post From Landon

2008-11-08T12:31:00.000-06:00

Well, I guess it's time for me to chime in with my two cents worth on what's going on with our current financial crisis. Let me prefice this by saying it's just my opinion! Hopefully this will bring some insight to you as I explain my position on this interesting situation.

Point 1 - Politicians are incapable of making these decisions.

I've come to the conclusion that most of the politicians trying to work this entire deal out on our behalf don't have the skills to really do what needs to be done. Seriously, I've come to the conculsion that most of them are incapable idiots. For instance, take a guy like Joe Biden. For the record, I'm not using him as an example because he's a Democrat. I'm using him because he's the first person that happened to come to mind. I'm sure there are Republicans just like this example.

Joe Biden has really done nothing in his life except be a politician. That's it. He's lived in the fantasy world of Washington DC for the last 30 years. He's never built a business, ran a company, led an organization, or made a decision that he directly had to be accountable for. He gets to "vote". He's one of 100 votes. He might be totally inept at making good decisions, but because he's never really "flying without a parachute", we have no idea if he's truly an excellent and informed decision maker. The only skill we know Biden and others like him posses is an ability to get elected to a job that I doubt the sharpest people in America would ever take.

Point 2 - Why the people we elect aren't the sharpest knives in the drawer.

Who the hell would really want to be a politician? Think about this for a minute. The best, brightest, and most capable people would never consider running for senate or congress. To get elected, you go out and beg for money making promises to people along the way you may or may not keep. Then if you're lucky and make it far enough to get on the ballot, you get to spend a few months hearing how crappy of a person you are on television and radio ads. Oh, but you get the satisfaction of saying crappy things about the other person vying for your job. Then, if elected, your job is in Washington DC. Most likely far away from where you call "home". But don't worry, before you know it you have to start the process all over again to keep this job.

All for 160k a year. Let's be honest...that's not much money. I believe there are a small portion of politicians that get in to it for the right reasons, but I believe there's a larger number of them that do it to fuel their need for self importance. I think most of them would fail miserably in the real world. Seriously, when's the last time you saw a help wanted ad that said -

"Wanted: A kiss ass glad hander that is capable of talking out both sides of their mouth. Must be loyal to one way of thinking (insinuating Republican or Democrat here) whether it's right or not. Must feel free to criticize their coworkers when things do not work out, but be willing to take all the credit with success. Company will never ask the successful applicant to make a decision and be held accountable; because all decisions in the company are done by a vote."

See my point here?

Let's throw a bunch of men and women in a room that probably are incapable of running even a simple business and allow them to figure this mess out. Have you ever sat around and watched CSPAN and listened to some of these politicians talk? It bothers me.

Point 3 - The truth about the "bailouts"

There are very few people that either...

1. Are describing what is going on accurately. Or...

2. Actually understand what these bail outs entail.

First, let me say. Our country should never be in the position it's in right now. Period. I beleive there is only 3 things that truly motivate people in our world. Sex, Greed, and Fear. I think if you stop and think about that for a minute you'll find that's true. Greed has caused the problem we are facing. Why it happened is an entirely different blog. Let me just say it shouldn't have happened, but the reality is it has happened. This blog is about what's going on now.

I'm sick of hearing the media and politicians talk about this bailout as a "burden to the taxpayers". That's the media playing the fear card to get more ratings.

As for why the politicians are saying it's a burden - I'm not sure if it's because they don't understand business well enough to know what is really going on, OR if they are just playing politics.

Folks, the government got a great deal on AIG. For the record we taxpayers BOUGHT an equity stake in the company. We now own 80% of it. Purchased at a depressed price. The time to be a buyer in business is when everyone else is selling. Ask Warren Buffet. He's rich because of that philosophy.

The reason for the bailout is simple. A tremendous amount of money is tied to real estate backed loans. Let me explain how this process works...

You go and borrow money from a bank to purchase a home. The loan is backed by real estate that's considered to be worth a certain amount of money. You agree to pay the bank a certain interest rate over an agreed to amount of time. Because of all of this, your mortgage has a certain "value" to an investor. Your loan is then packaged up with lots of other loans and sold on Wall Street to other institutional investors. AIG for instance, would be a company that might by notes like this. This process is called "securitization".

This process works because actuarians (smart math people that calculate risk) know what these notes are worth based on many calculations. There is an accepted value to these bundles of mortages. This value is as real to the investor as the money you have in your wallet.

What's happening is because of past greed corrupting the process, everyone is now unsure of what these bundles of mortgages are really worth. This was caused by overly optimistic real estate appraisals, lending policies that weren't based on common sense, and other factors. Oh, and by the way...before we start crucifying these banks for making these loans let me say that they were all hailed as heros for making affordable loans available to the masses.

That's another thing that really pisses me off and makes me shake my head. These banks were criticized for being "predatory", but now it's looking like the banks should have charged A LOT higher interest rates doesn't it? Higher interest rates help the bank offset risk. These loans obviously held more risk than people realized.

To finish the above thought - A person I respect a great deal and is much smarter than I am about economics and fiance said something recently that I believe to be true. He said, "Some people are just not cut out to be homeowners. They simply don't posess the life skills to be responsible enough to own a home." The fact is folks, nobody twisted people's arms in to accepting the loans these banks are being blamed for. Just like nobody twisted the banks arms in to extending the loan offer.

Anyway, back to my explanation. The situation we are now faced with is we need someone to come in and say - hey, we believe these notes are worth "xyz". When the notes were sold, they were sold for 100% of their face value. (They weren't exactly sold for that...but for the sake of this explanation they were), but now we need to establish a "corrected value" of these notes. The problem is, there isn't a single investor out there large enough to help establish that amount....except for the government.

I've talked to trusted people in the industry that are telling me that some banks are selling off these notes for as little as 25% of the face value. This is why the system is failing. Nobody knows what they are worth and it has caused an over reaction. I can tell you this, they are certainly worth more than 25 cents on the dollar.

The governments "bailout" isn't a gift of money to these companies. It's creating a buyer for these bundles of mortgages. They are helping to create a new value so the notes can be traded with confidence again.

As taxpayers, we'll own these mortgages or a portion of the companies that have own these mortgages. Let me ask you a question. Go outside and look around at the houses in your neighborhood. Almost all of the houses probably have a mortgage. If you had enough money, wouldn't you like to own all of the houses for say....50% of the amount owed on the current mortgage?

Of course you would. That's all we are doing with these "bailouts" that the media and the politicians keep howling about. It also illustrates why these people shouldn't be trusted with this decision.

I think that's the biggest injustice being played out in this whole "bailout". The average person thinks this money is just being pissed away. The truth is quite the opposite. If it's not screwed up by the politicians, this will be one helluva real estate investment. I swear on Waylon's grave to that statement. Hopefully we can take the profits from this and pay something down on our national debt.

Point 4 - What I would do

If it were soley up to me, I wouldn't let the politicians sort this out. I would create an executive board of real world business people with experience in these areas. I would also make sure the executive board's number one criteria for admission would be character. People like Warren Buffet. Let them hammer out a couple of different solutions and then demand the politiicans approve one or the other. That's it...no changing. You get one of two choices...now take your pick because we know you'll screw it up with politics if you go changing it.

It will be interesting to see what happens in the next few days with all of this. I hope as you watch it unfold, you'll think about some of what I've said in this blog. I hope it helps you keep it all in perspective as the politicians over complicate it and grand stand for their own puffery. It's a serious problem no doubt, but one that can be simplified and managed if we remove politics and would just allow honest business minds to make the decisions.

NASCAR

2008-11-08T11:54:00.006-06:00

We were really debating on whether or not to go to the races this year, because of our budget constraints.

We had still not bought any tickets a week before the race, when at one of Landon’s Gigs, one of his friends that lives in Kansas won a couple of tickets to the Nationwide race. She gave them to Landon, saying that she was not interested in racing and would especially not be driving down to Texas to watch it! So we were very lucky to have such friends, and went to the Nationwide race. Which our boy won!
It was a great time. Landon and I always have such a good time at the races. The fans are some of the best that we have ever encountered in all of our tailgating at sporting events.

So while we were parking and getting ready to go in, Landon gets a phone call from a guy that he has worked with here in Texas saying that he has a car pass to get into the infield (the center of the circle where all the cars go around) and if we want it that it is ours, because he is not interested in going. So we took him up on this as well.

We got to experience the infield of a NASCAR race. It was a great experience. The NASCAR race is about 4 hours, and a little long for me, but I still had a good time, and Landon had an excellent time. We met a few more fans that we made friends with while we were standing on the top of the RV watching the cars go around.

Great fun! I feel we are so lucky to have such friends and co-workers that we got to go to two races for free. This was great since we probably would not have gone. Thank you friends!

Halloween

2008-11-05T18:47:00.001-06:00

I know it is a little late, but I decided that I could still catch up with past new.
For Halloween, Landon and I decided to try something new, and went to another couples house to celebrate the evening there, so we turned off our porch light, and left.
We grilled, ate, and watched scary movies all while giving candy out at their house to the trick or treaters.
We had a great time, and now have done many different types of things on Halloween.
It also came to light that I have been gone for most of the Halloweens that we have not gone out, and Landon has done the treats. Crazy!

Hail to the chief elect

2008-11-05T07:11:00.002-06:00

How about that election. I guess we have a new president elect. I hope that he can keep up with all of his promises (as I do every election).
I am glad that we made history in a few ways yesterday, and I always hope for the best to come in the next 4 years.
Here is to change, and hope.

I've fallen and I cant get up!

2008-11-05T07:07:00.002-06:00

It seems like sometimes we get behind due to a nature of things, and sometimes like for me for the past few weeks, we cant dig ourselves out from under it.
I went to Utah and Idaho for a week a few weeks ago for work, and was lucky enough to work it out that I could see many of my family.
I made it to my parents homecoming which I was very glad I was able to do that, since I missed their farewell. I also met my brothers fiancée for the first time.
It was a little sad to go there, just because none of my nieces or nephews know who I am. (my own fault.) I need to find ways to visit home more often.
When I got back from Utah, I was not doing so hot! All this traveling get to me. I spent that weekend sleeping as much as I could, which turns out that I slept almost the whole weekend.
Then I could not catch up.
My house has not been dusted, or vacuumed, my dishes get done only to the minimum. I finally had to go grocery shopping yesterday, because we had nothing to eat.
I am going to get out from under this though I know it.
This past weekend we went to the race, and I will have highlights on that later once I have time to get the pictures from the camera set up.

Can't we all just get along?

2008-10-16T19:37:00.002-05:00

Ok, another what is it with people blog.
I was traveling for business the past few days, and I was up in Wichita KS. While here, my flight that was supposed to get me home yesterday at 7:00, was delayed, delayed, then cancelled. So here is where it gets crazy, and before I go into it, please know that I understand there are all sorts of reasons why everyone on that plane needed to be in Dallas last night.
I knew that my flight was delayed before I left where I was, problem is I have to turn in the rental car at the same time still, or be changed a late fee. So I have to go to the Airport three hours earlier than my flight is not supposed to leave to turn this in to avoid a fee.
So while I am sitting at the airport, I find the one place that I can get a sandwich (municipal airport like 10 gates) While heading to the “café” I see that it is overflowing with people. It happens to be the airport bar as well, so everyone has to stay within these roped off areas and are not allowed into the rest of the terminal with their drinks, so I think to myself…hmmm how hungry am I, and which flight are all of these people waiting for?
Turns out the flight that most of them were waiting on announced it was now leaving in 10 minutes.
So I wait the ten minutes, then belly up to the bar to get my sandwich. While doing this, I get caught in the middle of friendly banter with the four guys left in the area and the gal running the café.
So we become what I like to call friendly strangers. They all happened to be on the same flight as me, so we just joked around, and sat until the time our flight was supposed to board. We then walked the 50 feet to the gate, to sit there for about 2 more hours past the delayed time. Eventually they cancelled the flight due to mechanical issues (from a plane that had just landed…did the guys who were on it before know that there was a mechanical issue that would prevent even a take off?)
Anyway, back to the story, it is now about 9:00, and we find out that we need to stay the night, because the next flight to Dallas is in the morning at 6:30. So me and my three stranger buddies start calling all of our hotel contacts (other business frequent travelers) and find that every Hilton, Hampton, Hyatt, Radisson, and so on is completely booked. This is where the what is wrong with people part comes into play.
There are probably 50 passengers who need rooms (hence not from Wichita). Some are royally pissed, some are mildly irritated, and some are like me. The situation sucks, but what choice do you have? Go with the flow, and figure out what you can do to get it resolved.
So a few of the guys that I have been around cannot believe that we will have to stay at a hotel that the Airport deems acceptable. (which turned out to be a little older, but completely fine hotel). So they call and call and yell at these poor hotel people until they find a room somewhere they feel is acceptable.
The other few, are in line with me waiting to get rebooked.
Now comes my flight being canceled dilemma. Butch my dog is in his Kennel in my house. Landon has left a noon that day to go to a gig reliant on me to be home that night to let Butch out of his Kennel. So I call my neighbors, which although we are friendly, and have been over to their house, they have not been to ours, I did not know how comfortable I was asking them if they could please let my dog out, since he is not the nicest dog when it comes to strangers. Not only that, but they have to find the hidden key, go into our house with the key to a blaring house alarm, find the room that the alarm is in, remember the code that I gave them, all the while in the dark in an unfamiliar house, let the dog out without getting bit, and get him back into the house. Kind of a lot to ask someone right. But Once again, not a great situation, but one that has to be handled.
This all gets taken care of without any major hiccups (that I know about!) And I finally get to the hotel about 11:00. They say that since we had such a hard time getting there, that they would pay 5 bucks toward a dinner, and open the kitchen again for us, as well as have breakfast out at 4am instead of 6 since we had to be at the airport so early, as well as have taxi’s and shuttles waiting for us to take us to the airport.
So all in all everyone that is able is trying to make the best out of a rough situation. Yet there are still those few that completely lay into the people trying to help yelling at them like they could fix their situation. Why? Does it make them feel better to yell at a person that is doing their very best completely going out of their way to do so? I really don’t get it. Why cant we all just get along. Deal with what is given to us, and make the most out of it. We were all tired, all had situations that needed to be dealt with. Yet some were kind, others were terribly rude and others just were.

Alone time

2008-10-10T23:28:00.004-05:00

Ok. Explain this to me. I have for many years now been pretty much of a loner, and I have not minded one bit just hanging out at home by myself, either reading a book, or watching TV, whatever. But lately, I have craved company. It is weird. I always enjoyed my time to myself, and now I sit around wishing that I could call someone to go do something. Anything. I think I am bored.
I must need more friends…:) But do I really need more, or in a bit am I going to get back to normal, and like having my space back?
I am thinking it must be due to the fact that I used to deal with the public everyday, and not having to talk to anyone, or have anyone bug me was so pleasant. But now that I do not deal with the public, and I am cooped up in a cubicle every day, I crave company, and just to be with other people…the public (ick!)
Hmm. Something to think about.

Truth or Non-Truth

2008-10-09T20:02:00.005-05:00

What is it with Trust?
Everyone wants everyone to trust them…
Politicians, Strangers, Family, Friends, Co-Workers,
When is it ok to tell someone to their face the truth? We have become such a society filled with lies and deceit, that telling the truth has become taboo.
Think about it. Let give a very innocent example. Let say that there is a get together at your neighbors house that you are invited to, and go. Now lets say said “party” was not fun at all, and you just did not have the “click” that needs to happen for you to want to be their friend.
Here is what then usually happens. You do not tell your neighbor that you would prefer to keep your relationship on the “neighborly” level, you lie, and say that you had a great time, and “lets do it again sometime!” However, when those times arise, you conveniently always have something else to do, or go, and have another terrible time.
We have been trained to lie to save others feelings. Why? Are people so scared of rejection that they would rather you lie?
Why couldn’t this scenario instead go like this.
After the “party” you are polite, and say. You know, thank you so much for inviting us, good night.
The end. Do not feel obligated to say hey lets do it again, or any such jargon. Especially when you do not mean it.
If asked to come over again, once again, politely say no thank you.
IF you say this enough times, guess what, they will stop asking.
In doing such, you did not tell them that they were not your type of people, or that you were uncomfortable in their home, or their beliefs put you off. You simply thanked them for thinking of you, and then politely turned down their offer.
Now, here comes the part that I think most people have a hard time with…
If I do this, what will they think of me?
Who cares. What do you think of them? There must be a reason why you felt compelled to lie.
So if you do not care for them, why do you care what they think of you?
Perhaps they feel you are a stuck up yahoo, and would never invite you back again anyway!
I just think it is so dumb to lie to people and then in some cases suffer through your lie, like when they ask you to come over again, and because you lied in the first place, you feel obligated to lie again, so you go, and have a miserable time, then lie again…see the cycle. Stupid.
Sorry about this, but I have had this stuck in my craw, not because of my neighbors! But because of the whole presidential debate. I thought it sucked, and since I am a person who currently has no idea who she is going to vote for it really pissed me off and put me in this who don’t lie and cover things up mood.
Tell me what you are really going to try to do, and don’t tell me what you have already done, or what your opponent has not done. UGH.

Memories

2008-10-07T19:01:00.004-05:00

It is that time of Halloween again.
I was at work today just working along, and I was thinking to myself that I have not done anything for Halloween yet. We put a couple of cheesy decorations up around our workplace, and it made me remember a time when I was younger that my Dad did one of his crazy things that he really did not do that often.
We were having family home evening and it was a bit after he had had knee surgery so he was on crutches.
In the middle of the home evening, he was in the kitchen while everyone was in the living room, and he put something on, I really can't remember what it was a robe or some sort of costume, but he started coming into the living room all scary like (as much as he could on crutches) while he was singing a Halloween song. It made us all laugh hysterically, as my dad did not really do many things like this.
So as I was thinking about this, I decided to write the Halloween song out on a white board outside of my office, just so I could have a good memory each time I went into my office!
Thank you dad for giving us this memory!

Fact or Fiction/Dream or Reality

2008-10-06T07:33:00.000-05:00

I have always had vivid dreams. Every since I was a little girl. In fact the first dream that I remember was when I was very young. I would dream about monsters, and at the end of the dream, I would dream of the end of the Looney Toon shows where they have the circles of different colors, and the pig would come in the circles and say “that’s all folks“. Well, instead of the pig, it would be the monster that I had just had the terrible dream about. I had this happen to me in almost every bad dream I had when I was little, and it would always be the monster that I had the dream about that came through those circles. I think this was probably a pretty average bad dream for a child, but when I started to get a little older, my dreams got significantly worse.
I think that I had abandonment issues, or still do perhaps, because I would always dream about my family leaving me somewhere, like at a rest stop while we were traveling, or even at home while they went on a trip.
Then came the dream that I will not ever forget as long as my mind is sane. I really do not remember how old I was, but we had just either watched a show, or gone to a museum about Hitler. Which ever it was, I had a dream that Hitler captured my whole family (there are nine of us) and made me sit and watch while he killed every one of them. In different ways. Some were gassed, some where hung, and some were burned, and I watched while each of them died terribly. I woke up after this, and I don’t think I was ever the same. My pillow was absolutely drenched with my tears, and I got out of bed, and went into every single brother and sisters bedroom, and my Mom and Dads room, just to make sure that it had in fact been a dream.
After that dream, the tone of my dreams changed. The were no longer about made up scary monsters, they were about real life events that were terrible.

I also had very productive dreams. You know how many people say that they have a specific place that they come up with their ideas? Some in the shower, some while driving, mine come in my dreams. They always have.
My dreams also fix my problems that I am having. Such as when I was in school, and had to write a book report, yet could not come up with a topic, I would dream about doing a book report, and what I would do it on, same for hard math equations that I had struggled with. I relied a lot on my dreams to help me in my everyday life. I also had dreams that ended up being true. Such as my boyfriend breaking up with me, or someone asking me out. Things that my conscious mind could not see because it was too busy, but when it was at rest, these things that I saw came out.
Dreams…I still have them often and they are still quite vivid. They still come up with resolutions to problems, they still come true because they point out things that I have been to busy to see, and they are still about people I love dying, or leaving. I also dream about things that make me incredibly mad at people for no reason other than they pissed me off in my dream. (Landon loves those ones!)
Dreams. Why do we really have them? Are they so that our minds can slow down and process all the overload that we put in them everyday? Or are they just anomalies that we have?

What am I going to do with kids??

2008-10-04T10:53:00.000-05:00

This week has been one of those weeks where we had to let the kennels take Butch.
Landon has been on the road all week, and I have been in Minnesota working.
So that means that Butch had no one to care for him. So he got to go to his not favorite place.

Landon dropped him off there on Tuesday, and I picked him up on Friday. Just 4 days you say. That is not a big deal.
To Butch it is almost the end of the world. I am not sure what happens at the kennels, but this is Butch’s behavior after I pick him up. (everytime)

First thing in the car on the way home, he runs around jumping into the back seat, back into the front, onto my lap, back to the other front seat, into the back all the while getting so excited that he is going home that he starts to pant. Amid his panting, he is making little whining noises.
Once we get home, I let him out of the car while I unpack all of his stuff that we have to take to the kennels, as well as all my luggage, and ect. While I am doing this, he is happily peeing on every bush he can find.
Once I get the car unloaded and get him in the house, he runs as fast as he can to his dishes. where he will drink until it almost makes him puke, then whines to go outside again. (Where does all the pee come from?) Where he pees on the new trees we planted outside.
I get him to come in the house, and he runs to his dishes again this time to start hogging down his food.
Then for a while he seems back to normal again. Until it is time to go to bed. He happily goes outside, then comes and jumps on the bed to go to sleep. It is about 10 - 10:30. At midnight he cries to go outside. I get up let him out, he once again goes to his food bowl after he gets back in the house and starts hogging again.
Fast forward to 2:30am. Cries to go outside again. Same scenario as above.
Text Landon saying his dog is crazy.
Hour later Landon calls. Not so sure what he said, because I was mostly asleep.
Fast forward to 5:30am. Butch cries to go out again. Let him out. hogs food. Back to bed.

Then onto 7am Butch is now just bored I am sure of it. But I let him out anyway and he once again does his business.
Did he ever go to the bathroom at the Kennels? Or did he hold it all in until he could come and let it out on his own turf? If not, I am really not sure where it all came from.
At this point I just get up. Now that I have gotten up, and spent hours playing with him, he has not had anymore sudden urges. They only come when I am asleep I guess!
keep in mind, he is four pounds. Can you see how much food he has eaten? That is almost his weight in food...

Life of Music

2008-09-28T22:01:00.002-05:00

In reference to our slogan on this page. Our life is lived for the love of life and music. Landon loves to make music whether it be writing it, or playing it, either way he is happy. Me, I used to love to play. In a little bit different venue than him, I loved to play the violin, I truly did. Not in a solo situation, but with an orchestra. I loved the rehearsals, I loved the performances. Lets just say I loved to hear the results of hard work and dedication. I also loved to sing. Once again, not in a solo situation, but with a group. To hear the harmonies take shape, and turn out awesome. Both Landon and I were in many musical venues growing up. He was more into Piano, and Band, where I was into Choir and Orchestra.
I can no longer play the violin like I would like to due to injuries that I sustained, and have no venue that I would care to sing in, so I cope with this by listening to others make music.
Landon now plays for a living, and I could spend hours listening to music. Mind you, I am not really fond of the live scene unless it is blues ( I love listening to blues live) I do like to go watch Landon in his element, sometimes it just a bit too loud for my taste (yup I am getting old!) but I usually enjoy it immensely.

I found this playlist.com from my sisters blog, and I am now addicted. Because my taste in music has so many ranges I could build so many players with so many different kinds of music. I do try to keep it mostly clean for the songs I post to my page, but I feel that music has always been an outlet for me of sorts. When I am feeling in the dumps, I just put on some crazy lively music, and it helps. If it is one of those moods that lively music is not what I want, I put on depressing music, and just wallow in self pity for a while, event that usually brings me out of my funk.

You know that game that people like to play (mostly men [lol]). Where you will be listening to the radio, and the person you are with says. Hey can you guess who sings this song? I always hated this game, because regardless of my passion for music, my passion to know who sang it, the name of it, and what year it was recorded was not included in that. In fact in most cases, I can listen to a song for years, and never know who sings it. I just don’t care.
Well, My husband used to love to play this game, until I turned it around on him, and started asking him who sings it. He now does not like to play so much!
I have been pestering him most of the day today as he has been watching the race to guess who, and to tell me some songs by particular artists that he likes so I could add them.
Mind you, he is really good at the guessing game, and he knows so many songs it would astound most people.
But he has not wanted to play today, so I have kept putting songs on a new play list. (the one that is now playing).
And I have enjoyed putting it together. This one turned from 80’s to 70,s but still the same, they are songs that I like! If you do not like them, I put my player at the top of the screen on purpose so that anyone could quickly hit pause.
My blog will always have music attached somehow, since it is a big part of my life.

Wedding Bells

2008-09-27T11:16:00.000-05:00

(picture of what C to the R has to look forward to!)
My youngest brother is getting married. He called me last night about midnight, and the first thing he says is “are you tired?” Crazy kid, I was in bed, and half asleep. Of coarse I was tired!
I am so excited for him, and hope that he knows what he is getting into! :)
(did any of us really know?)
From what I know, My parents newly home from the forgotten lands of nowhere went to visit my brother under the gist that he was going to help them find a new car. Little did they know that they were going to be roped into helping him pick out a wedding ring for the now engaged woman who will now be know as C to the R.
He asked her last night, and gave her the above mentioned ring which I heard her talking about to her mother while I was on the phone with J. I think she likes it! Good work J.
I guess I now no longer have to wonder about when I am going to use my last week of vacation.
Thanks J and C to the R for giving me a reason to come home!

Family Ties

2008-09-25T23:22:00.000-05:00

I was just perusing some of my families blogs, when I came across some pictures of one of my cousins daughters.
First, she is darling.
Second, It put me on a path down memory lane.
I remembered some great times with my family (extended and immediate)
Every year for almost every holiday we would get together with all the Aunts, Uncles, and Cousins at one of our homes. We met at Grandma and Grandpas house quite often.
We would play all day long with all the cousins. We had our own age groups that would break off due to age, but we would all be in the same house, and we were always quite a crew. We would always eat tons, I am not sure how things did not end up more messy while we were there. (Perhaps they did, and I was the child so did not notice those things)
Those were such fantastic times. I am so grateful that my Mom and Dad made it an important part of our lives to know our whole family.
I often feel so inadequate in this aspect of my life.
I spoke to my youngest brother yesterday, and so many things that are big and important are happening in his life, and I knew nothing about any of them. This made me feel so very inadequate as a sister.
I hardly ever talk to him, and the last time I saw him was Christmas.
Now the sadder part, He is the last person in my family that I have seen.
I really think about them often, and wonder what is going on but have let the money situation get in my way of going to visit. It is so spendy to go from the South to the North West.
Yet some of my family make the effort, and seem to be able to afford it. I don’t know how.
I then called one of my other brothers that I had not spoken to in a while, and made sure I knew what was going on in his life. I care about my family deeply, and want them to know that even though I am not the sister that keeps in touch the best, or visits. I want to. And it makes me sad when I feel that I cannot afford it, because they are very important to me, and I do not think that they realize that. I have not been good enough at letting them all know. I will try to do better. It is always my goal in my life to strive to better those things that I find faulty in myself.
I will continue on, and one day I will be able to say. I am not near perfect, but I have become who I wanted to be, and those who matter know that they matter.

What can I do that will spike my interest?

2008-09-25T19:18:00.000-05:00

I am unsettled. I have been roaming around aimlessly for the past few weeks thinking what can I do that will interest me?
I am having a terrible time at work trying to stay on task. I really put myself to the task for at least an hour at a time getting my work done, but that is about the length of my attention span lately, I then have to get up, and roam for a few minutes before I can stand to force myself to get back to work.
At home, I am hardly interested in anything. I cant figure out what to cook for dinner, because nothing sounds good…I am not too interested in any of the shows that have been on, and they have all been season premieres. I want to get out and do something, but I am not sure what to do, and the things that I think would be good are too much money for me to afford right now…
I was so excited to go camping to get away and do something, and it was great, but went by so quickly. Now what can I do? I cant think of a book I want to read...That is when I know it is bad. Reading is my outlet, and my passion.
So I finally put a word to my feeling today. Unsettled.
I guess that all the uncertainty in my life is starting to get to me. Our adoption processes are at a point where we are almost done with all the pre-work, so we may have children in our home in a few months, or two years, it is so unpredictable. I am still a little unsettled at my job, because I am still not 100% comfortable with my responsibilities, and what they encompass. I am getting closer, but still not there. And Landon seems to be a bit unsettled himself, which does not help things! Two people going crazy in the same house.
The world around me is driving me crazy with its uncertainly, and so here I am not sure what to do with myself.

Campout!

2008-09-22T13:13:00.000-05:00

We had a great time camping this weekend! Landon and I went up Friday afternoon (I got to flex at 12:00!) so we found the campground that we had reservations for, we were not able to camp at the campground we had previously stayed, because it was full, so we had to camp on the other side of the lake.
It took another 40 minutes to get to the other campground, but we eventually found it, got a site that we thought would be good, and set up.
The last site that we stayed at on this lake was really quiet. Not too many dogs, or many young kids, it was nice.
This side of the lake, or it could have just been the time of year…There was a dog at almost every campsite, as well, as tons of little kids. And by the sounds of it, not too many of them were having a good experience.
We are going to be there with the noisy kids someday, but right now, it is nice to go camping, and not have to be woken up by a screaming child.
However, I will give them this; it was probably the crows that woke the child! Those darn things were loud as.
After we got set up, and made a quick dinner, we just hung out for the rest of the night, it was great. The next day, our friends (who will henceforth be known as LC and SC) came up with their boat, so we went out on the Lake for most of the day.
We played around in a nice cove, and then later after asking Landon and me if we wanted to ski, and us declining! SC decided that he would go ahead and wake board, then ski.
After telling us that he was terrible, and not to be too disappointed by his performance, he went out and showed us his stuff.
Just one thing to say to SC. Whatever, you were awesome. You can’t tell us again that you are terrible, and have us believe you! And as for LC, maybe next time for the tube ya?
It was so great to have company on our camp trips. Not that we don’t like to go by ourselves, we do, but it was also very nice to shake things up a bit, and have friends.
The weather could not have been better. And the company was superb. I would say that we had an excellent time.
It was a great day! After we got back to land we went back to camp, made tinfoil dinners, and then just hung out, played some games, and just relaxed!
Sunday was pack up day, so we ate, and then packed up.
LC and SC went back out on the Lake, while Landon and I finished striking camp. We then went down to the beach to see how it was. There was a “No Dogs on the Beach” clause so we ended up not swimming. It was too hot to leave poor Butch in the Truck.
And if we tied him to a bench outside of the beach area, he would be one of those Dogs that I spoke about earlier. One that would be way worse than any crying child too!
So we went home, unpacked, started the wash and watched the race.
Ahhh. Another great weekend with my husband here.

State of the Union

2008-09-19T10:25:00.001-05:00

My concern for the state of the Union has been steadily increasing. My husband and I make a pretty good living, we have a modest house, with modest vehicles, and have been able to always eat, and fill our cars up with fuel, and still have a bit of money left for a bit of entertainment (such as camping!)
But recently, we have had to really start cutting back, using coupons, and not going to a campground in Oklahoma because it is too far to drive with fuel prices the way they are.
Here is the point I am getting at. We…a two income family with no children are starting to feel the real pinch of the prices at the pump which in turn have raised the price of almost everything. Some things significantly.
What are families doing that were already living paycheck to paycheck?
They are not getting paid any more at work, and some of them do not have that little cushion that they can just do without. They are having to choose whether to fill up the car with fuel so they can go to their job, or feed their kids dinner.
This is what I am concerned about. All the higher ups in the country say…”this is not a recession, we have not hit that level yet…” What do we have to see to hit a recession “level”?
Perhaps I am not as up to date on the true state of the economy, but I am worried about those that are less fortunate than my family, yet now that I have had to use any extra income I did have on needs rather than wants, I do not have that much left to give to others. I still have my weekly pay check deduction that I give to United Way, but I have very little else to give. I am now living paycheck to paycheck.
So when there is the most need for support, there is the least to give.
The food banks are crying for people to give, yet people are struggling to feed their own families, so the usual people who always give, no longer can, and the people who really need help have no where to go.
I am admittedly a little ignorant of the whole Fannie May, Freddie Mac thing, and how the government spending all that money to take over helps us, and perhaps it was the best move out there for families to keep their homes, but pretty soon they are not going to be able to keep them anyway if we don’t quit what we are doing as a country and focus on getting alternate methods of fuel, what ever happened to 100% solar cars? I know that we could not drive too far at night, but for those that could have a “commute” car that was all solar would save so many natural resources.
If we can come up with new ideas every month on new fangled things for our cell phones, and ipods, why don’t we focus these creative intelligent people on finding a way to get rid of our dependency on oil.
And if someone of something is standing in our way, who is allowing these companies to have that much power?
Just electing the right president is not going to fix this.
We have a country where we are free, yet we are still shackled by our government and their choices.

How is it I never thought of that?

2008-09-18T18:55:00.000-05:00

I love the mountains, I love the rolling hills, I love the fountains, I love the daffodils wheeeeen the lights are low boom diada boom diada boom diada boom dia.
I am so excited to get this party started! I am finally going camping. Get away from the hustle and bustle of daily normal life, and get out to the almost all natural nature!
I was talking to one of my co-workers today whilst thinking to myself, I sure wish it was Friday! Just as she said, happy Friday Eve…What? That is great. I love Eves, Christmas Eve, Thanksgiving Eve, Easter Eve, you know how that goes…I am so glad to have another Eve that I can look forward to EVERY week!
I will probably forget about this by two Thursdays from now, because there is just entirely too much stuff forced into my brain, that the unnecessary items have to fall out!
But until I forget! Yeah it is Friday Eve!
BURRITO day is coming!!! oops now known as omelet day. Too bad. I sure liked those burritos!

What has happened to Society? We have turned into Lazy unloyal debt mongers.

2008-09-17T07:08:00.000-05:00

Where did Loyalty go? Where did the work ethic go? What happened with Space Travel?
This is a topic that has really bothered me of late. Partly because of my job, but it is rampant in every part of our lives.
Lets take the work force. 30 years ago, a person would stay at the same job for years. Usually ending up retiring in this job. But then we started needing things faster, and in more quantities, and these people who were loyal were getting laid off after 30 years of service. For Robots, or a younger more aggressive workforce.
So then their kids saw this, and said to themselves, I am not going to let myself get stuck in that rut. So now days it is not looked poorly on a candidates application if they have worked at 6 different jobs in six years…Why?
Is there is a reason why people switch jobs so much? Why not find a job, and put up with it? If there is a lot of Bull at that job, perhaps find another one, but if there is the normal bull, stick with it. The grass is definitely not always greener on the other side.
When I was in my previous position (in the same company!), I was in a position that I hired people for jobs in a retail environment. This is where I had the hardest time. I would have applicants come in that were very young, gave them their first job ever, and then saw them flounder when they realized that it was not a social job, it was hard work. They would come up to me and say, “I cannot work here anymore, you expect too much of me and pay me too little.”
What is going to happen to these kids? If that job was too hard, isn’t the next one going to be too?
I see this being rampant. Kids are growing up lazy, with no sense of loyalty. Getting into debt, getting married saying that is too hard and getting divorced. Getting a good job, then saying that it is too much work, with not enough pay, and quitting. They then get deeper into debt, because they now do not have a job, yet they keep up their same spending habits. Then they default on their credit cards, their home loans, ect. Say having creditors breathing down their neck is too hard, and claim bankruptcy.
Man…and we wonder what has happened with the economy. People overextending themselves to ensure they have nice things, yet not making enough money to pay for them.
This drives me crazy.
Life is hard.
Marriage is hard
Keeping a job and finding things you like about it everyday is hard.
Telling yourself that you dont need the things you cant afford is hard.
but staying in a marriage regardless of the hard times is rewarding.
Staying in a job and doing your best is rewarding.
Staying out of debt is enourmously rewarding. Not right away, but later when you can afford to put your kids through college.

Hopeful Camper

2008-09-14T19:58:00.000-05:00

Summer is almost gone

Most times this would not be a great sentiment for me as I have always been a summer type of person. But that was back in the day when I lived in a more temperate climate! Now I live for Spring and Fall. Partly because we can go camping! Yeah!
I have been wanting to go camping so bad for a while, and have not had the chance to do it because it has been so incredibly hot, and humid. Camping in this type of weather is miserable.

I am hoping that I can convince Landon that this next weekend would be a great weekend to go. (I hope that it does not rain)
He once again has a weekend off, and I want to take full advantage of it to get our camper out, and go into the somewhat wild.
Here in Texas there really isn’t any place that I would call wild. But a good lake, and some trees will do for me now!
Maybe we can go to Ray Roberts again. That was a pretty nice place
Here is to hoping I can go camping this weekend!

Am I getting old?

2008-09-14T09:10:00.001-05:00

Here it is the day after a whole night of playing Tennis, Bowling, Baseball, and Boxing on the Wii, and oh my. I am such a wimp. I can hardly move my right arm. Example. Lets go to me trying to eat some cereal this morning. First I have to get the cereal off the top shelf of the pantry, the whole 19 oz. was almost too much for me to hold on to, then go for the milk. Only a half Gallon, and it is almost gone yet was still a difficult task. OK here comes the most terrible part. Go to me putting in the spoon, and trying to make it to my mouth. I didn’t know I actually used any muscle to do that every morning, but this morning, it was rough! My arm hurts so bad!! :)
So on to other things, I went to bed last night around 2am, thinking, oh yes, I can so sleep in tomorrow! Nope. 5:30am Butch needs to go outside (I swear that I just let him out!) but I would rather get my sleepy butt out of bed then to clean up the results of not doing just that.
I then stumble back to bed, and lo and behold 6:30 Butch wakes me up again. This time I looked at him and said …really? I let you out 1 hour ago, and not only that you have not ate, or drank anything since then. I think he was just bored, because he had been in his kennel the whole time I was out yesterday. He was saying, you had your fun, now I want to play!

So just as I was getting up out of bed, I get a crazy charlie horse in my calf, so I drop to the floor, and start stretching it out, and beating the living daylights out of my own flesh to stop the pain! (I think back to one of yesterdays Ballgames and us making so much fun of the little wus that had to go to the sidlines for a little cramp!) but I eventually got up, and here I am now a little later throwing around the alligator so that Butch can chase it!
One of those responsibilities be it a dog, or a kid. They have their own time table, and you need to adhere to it, regardless of what you chose to do the day before!

Gotta love em though!
Here is a video of Landon and I messing around with poor Butch. We get our thrills so easily.

The results of the Hurricane IKE party

2008-09-14T01:17:00.000-05:00

I had a fantastic night. Regardless of the fact that we saw almost no rain, and very little wind. The Hurricane party turned out to be a normal everyday get together. Sad to say, but it is not often that I get to hang out with friends, that I have so much in common with, and just have fun playing games, and exchanging stories. It has been so refreshing to find friends that I can feel comfortable with, and not have to worry about all of the politics with other people.
We watched college football, played the wii, and just had a good time. I am so glad that this couple came to Texas, I know that they both miss home, but I hope they can start to feel a bit better about living in Texas after a while!
I do not have too many people that I can just hang out with. I love that I can with them. And I hope that this is the start of a great friendship, that we can do this often, and not get bored of each others company.
Go Gamecocks! :)

New slide shows

2008-09-13T10:44:00.000-05:00

I have changed my slide shows. If you want to take a look at the new ones.
I am going to have to continue to rotate them in and out, because if I put them all on here, the page would be veerryyy slooowww.

Hurricane IKE

2008-09-13T10:01:00.001-05:00

Well, here on the outskirts of Dallas, we are just beginning to feel the impact of Ike. (picture above from Corpus Christi from our South Texas trip)
The people from south Texas started filing in yesterday. We are expected to get pretty crazy wind and rain, but not even close to what the coastal regions are dealing with right now.
So what did My friends and I do? We have put together a Hurricane party.
We are going over to one of our houses and playing games, and eating dinner.
So that we can watch the hurricane (which by the time it hits us will I am sure be a tropical depression)
pass over, and celebrate all those that got out in time.

Mid Year Appraisal time

2008-09-13T09:58:00.001-05:00

I had my mid-year appraisal on Thursday, and I will be honest with you. With this new position that I got promoted to in April, I was a little nervous. It is a position that there is just not a lot of training for, so you just have to fly by the seat of your pants and figure things out while you go, like what your job responsibility really are. It has been a struggle for me also, because in my last position, I was the good guy that helped stores with issues that they had, and resolved problems that they had.
Now I am the bad guy that calls and asks why they spent more salaries than they had sales for.
I saw the meeting for my appraisal go on my calendar last week, and have had a nervous stomach ever since. So by Thursday, I had gone through the goals that were set, and had questions written down for almost all of them. And went in at least prepared to hear that I was not doing what I really should be.
I was a little surprised that while they saw the need for me to continue to grow in my position they thought I had been doing a pretty good job so far, and answered all of my questions, so I think I may be better prepared now to at least aim to achieve some of my goals, and for sure make others. So one more mid-year passes, and I still have a job, (phew)

Parents...

2008-09-09T19:43:00.000-05:00

I have to say, what a difference a night makes! I was able to carry my own sunshine with me all day!

I was sitting here at my computer compiling letters that my Mom and Dad have written while they have been away, and I realized I think it really sunk in that they are coming back home next week!.
Those two statements may need some clarification yeah?
Ok. My parents have been living within the Islands of the Federated States of Micronesia for the past two years. And until a few months ago, were only reachable by e-mail. Then they got Skype, however, trying to talk to someone on Skype that is halfway across the world, and has to rely on dial up is not an easy task, so I still found the best way to communicate was with e-mail, or the chat functionality of Skype.
I have not ever been the type that relied heavily on my parents, they taught their family to be independent, and I think that most of us are very independent.
However, I have to confess. I did not realize how heavily I still did rely on them. For emotional support, and just for friendship.
It is odd growing up. When I was a child my parents were my world, then I grew to the teenage part of my life, and my parents were so not my world, I wanted out of their house as fast as I could (I think this must be a weird teenage thing that happens to quite a bit of the population!)
Then while I was on my own for many years, I really can’t say that I thought too much about my relationship with my parents. I spoke with them once a month or so, and e-mailed when I remembered (which was not often…bad daughter!)
However, with them out of reach for two years, I can say that I have had moments of time where I really missed them.

Hmmm. Now what am I going to do? Go visit? They'll have to have a million things to do since they have been gone for so long, and when would a good time be. I am actually a little anxious about this, and don’t understand why.
This feeling is very odd for me, and I am not sure how to react. I guess I will just keep on keeping on. And go with the flow.

Monday , Monday

2008-09-08T22:13:00.000-05:00

I have been irritable all day today. I hate days like this. I get up, go about my normal routine, go to work, and once there, and the slightest thing were making me have to grit my teeth and hold my tongue. All day the smallest things that usually just roll off my back were bothering me to the point where I had to put myself in time out for a bit to cool off. :)
And for those of you who know me, I am a pretty level headed, laid back person. So when I cant get a hold of my irritability it irritates me!
Not only that, but I once read a book that I actually liked that said you need to carry your own sunshine with you. I did try today, it just was not a sunny day in my little space!
So I got through the day, and was driving home thinking what the heck is wrong with me today. Then it hit me…That lovely part of being blessed to be born woman.

I sometimes hate being a woman. But most days I am proud. Today, I am just not!

My husband calls just as I am realizing my issue, and says to me why don’t you go home, hang out with the dog and watch football, that will make you feel better!
I love him so much for that, because I love my dog, and I love football. Not only that, it was my team that was playing!
So I did just that. Came home hung out with Butch (the dog) and watched my team get their a**s kicked.
Oh well. Being a Vikings fan, that happens a lot! I still just cant be a switch hitter, so I still hold out faith every year that this will be the year. I know it has not been their year since the 80’s but hey…you never know.
So I am now just tired. And I hope tomorrow will be better. And I will try to bring my sunshine with me!

Freedom of Choice

2008-09-07T11:38:00.000-05:00

Well, I woke up this morning, came and checked my e-mail, and lo and behold, there was another e-mail from the Mother of the two kids we were looking to adopt. You know the one who changed her mind. Told us that there was no way ever that she could give up her kids, and that she was very sorry. Well. It seems she has a hard time making and keeping a decision.
She has changed her mind again. She wants us to have her two kids. But not yet. She has things that she has to get done first.
I think that this is worse than having her tell us she did not want to give them up. Feeling the initial disappointment of having it not work out, just to have her dangle the carrot once again. I think that I want to be done with this situation. I am not even angry at her for leading us on this whole time, have us get all the legal things figured out,. Involve other people that I love, have them spend time, money, and feel the stress that comes with anything like this.
I am irritated that she says she cant, then says she can.
I even understand that this must be one of the hardest choices in her life, but if she was not sure, she should have not ever said that this is what SHE wanted in the first place. It would have saved a lot of people worry, money, and hurt. If the answer is No, say no, and mean it. We are not sure what we are going to do now. All she wants is the one thing we do not have much to give, and that is Time.
My choice is to still pursue the State of Texas adoption, which will take a bit more time anyways, if she comes through, then she will. If she doesn’t, she doesn’t. I am not going to put my hopes on this any longer.
I know I sound a little angry. I am. I cant help it. This is important to my family as well, and has put untold amounts of stress on my husband and I to figure everything out for us as well as make arrangements for her in every way possible.(with the help of many people), and have her not be able to do anything for herself, not even make a choice and stay with it.
Whatever…I am done.

This video that we took one time while camping is kind of how I feel. Just pushing rocks around. Not getting a lot accomplished.

High hopes, and disappointing times

2008-09-06T10:41:00.000-05:00

Well, the fiasco with the mother and her children is over, she has changed her mind. So we are back to our original plan. At least we will be in Texas long enough to get the process of all the classes, and home studies complete, and be able to actually try again.
This has been a stressful, and trying time with these children.
They live in a terrible situation with all of their parents, and grandparents not even on the same continent as them, leaving them to whomever will take them in, and yet, they think they are fine, and do not understand that there is a better life out there.
The mother wanted to give them a better life, but then the grandparents, and the people she was living with stepped in, and said that they are her kids, and how could she give them away...so she changed her mind.
They are right, they are her children. But for the situation she has left them in, if she was living here, they would have been wards of the state by now.
But they live in a place that does not have the best interest of the children at heart, and so they will continue to live in that terrible place with no mother, father, or grandparents there to care for them.
And that will have to be alright with us. There are many children here at home that we could give a better life to, so we will go find them.

Right or Wrong? Left Wing or Right?

2008-09-06T00:10:00.000-05:00

Back to the topic of Sarah Palin, (speaking of Sarah, here is a picture I took while in alaska) and her ability to run as VP, and how she is so much like the rest of the world, yet...
There are some out there that say she should not abandon her children to run for office, that she talks about family values, yet where are hers?
I have a hard time with this sentiment only because I will be a working mother, due to the fact that my husband is a musician, and very good at his skill, but until he makes it big :) , I need a steady job to ensure we can afford our life.
So when children come into the picture, (which by the way we will be adopting), when my husband is out of town, they will go to day care.
So some may say...why are you adopting children just to drop them off everyday with someone else?
I say...
If they are able to be adopted chances are their world was much more grim than having to go to "pre-school" and having a mother and father who love them pick them up everyday, and take them to a home where dinner will be made, and they have a comfortable bed to sleep in, and they are safe.
I still think I am doing the right thing.
And I am a career woman, working up a very busy ladder.
Not only that, but when my husband goes to play sometimes he is out of town for weeks at a time. So not only am I a career minded women, half of the time I will be a "single mother" working a full time job.
So I have a feeling that I will be looked at as a saint for adopting in some peoples eyes, and a heathen for adopting and not staying home in others.
But what I think I am is a woman who wants to give a child who is already here a second chance at a better environment.
There is also the question or statement that comes up that people feel bad for us because we cannot have children of our own, and how sad for us that we cannot have our own flesh and blood.
Let me squash these questions or statements. We are adopting children because we want to, not because that is our second choice. There is no reason why we could not have children of our own. We have just chosen a different path for our family.
So would the right thing still be to not adopt?
That is the question.
And perhaps the question for Sarah Palin would be...are her children well cared for. You know a mother is not the only person who can care for a child. What about the dad? Or the Grandparents? They all lived together in the same town.
Hmmm.

The life and the times.

2008-09-04T21:29:00.000-05:00

I have been reading Mrs. B Roths blog, and there has been much talk about many touchy subjects that everyone in the word regards differently.
Religion, Sex, and Politics!
So I thought I would put my views out there as well, since this is my blog!
Lets start with politics, since that seems to be the topic of the day.
Sarah Palin...What to do with her. Do we like her? Do we judge her? Or do we accept her?
Well, I can tell you there is one part of the campaign this year that I really do like. The fact that the notion is going around that it does not matter if you are a registered Republican, or a registered Democrat, or anything in between.
What really matters is that you agree with their plans, and TRUST them.
Now while I completely agree with this, and could never myself register as any party due to the fact that I have voted all different ways depending on who was running, for what office, and what they stood for.
I do have a problem with the TRUST part.
Do we really Trust any of the people running for office? Do we know them? Do we know what they will do in a tough situation. Are they secretly greedy, and can be bought. Do they have a past experience like McCain that could make him racist, or at least less apt to listen to a particular type of person. We would be putting him right smack in a war. Where he did not have such good experiences from his tour. But perhaps that made him more capable?
So what do we really know about any politician?
There are people out there who say they would not vote for Hillary because she stayed married to a man who cheated on her (I would be assuming more than once) but until we live in her shoes, do we know why? I would be more likely not to vote for her because of her persona of superiority, than that she stayed with a cheater.
What about Obama? He does not have the experience, and I do think that is important. But is it the most important?
So when it all comes down to it. Do we fall back on..."well, I have no idea who to choose, because I do not really agree with all points from any candidate" and vote for who we feel our "party" is regardless of ideals?
That is the reason that we vote! We have the chance to put ourselves out there and say...while I do not agree with everything that you say, I am going to trust you to keep my family safe, and to provide good schools, and to make this country one that I am proud to live in.
What a heavy burden for anyone.
I will vote, but I have not decided for whom, due to the fact that I have not taken the time to properly research each of the candidates. And I do not trust everything I see on TV, or read on the Internet. :) However, I do have to use those sources for everything, so lets hope that 80% of the facts that I get are in fact true!
Since this blog has gotten a little long winded, I am going to have to leave the Sex and Religion topics for another time!

Hmmm.

2008-08-24T10:32:00.000-05:00

The mother of the two children that we are trying to adopt called last night about 12:30 she is on the west coast…and I don’t think thought about the time difference :). It was alright however, because I was up until 2:30 watching the Lord of the Rings Trilogy in its entirety. Yes I have a very full life!
Anyways, I have a little more hope that this may actually come through. It would be so awesome if it did, but I still am trying very hard not to get my hopes up too far, because it would still be so easy for her to say no. We are trying really hard just to go with the flow, and see where this takes us. We do still hope it takes us to a place where we have 2 great kids in our home! Wish us luck!

Here it is Saturday...

2008-08-23T11:28:00.000-05:00

I have come to love and hate Saturdays. Love them because it is my long awaited day off from my work week, and hate them because I am usually alone.
Let me qualify both of those statements!
First. I got a promotion about 2 years ago that gave me a pretty cushy job that is 8-5 M-F. This from my previous position that was sometimes 4 in the morning and sometimes started at 6p and went until 2 in the morning. With working usually all but one weekend in a month with those same crazy hours. However, I could sleep in on the days that I worked late, and I had a day off or sometimes two during the week. This M-F job, it makes it very hard to get anything done. Such as doctor appointments, dentist, getting your car lubed, so on and so forth.
So everything that I used to get done, I now have to plan for a lunch hour, select a place that is close to my work instead of my home and sometimes ask my boss for half a day off to just get normal everyday things done.. That is so frustrating. And plus, you always know that Saturday is your day off, so you have to get everything done that you have not been able to do all week all in one day. Yet it is a day off! Yeah.

Second. As much as I do love to have time for myself, every weekend is too much! Landon has been playing (which he loves heart and soul) so much this year. Last weekend he had off, I think it was the first one since February. And it was over sooo quickly. But we had an excellent time!
Hence my Saturday dilemma

2008-08-21T20:07:00.000-05:00

Our House in Texas last fall with our little tree turning color for the two weeks of fall that we get here!

Our newer car (we needed something that got more tha 15 MPG!) This is on the coast in Corpus Christi.